- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


So you say that you read PopSense
You've sent it to all your friends
And while many have taken offense
You stick with us till the end

But every now and then
You just can't help but say
More about Tina Chen?
You mocked her yesterday!

No more Britney, no more rants,
Enough about these hos!
Obviously you want in Christian Bale's pants
And you hate the Jonas Bros

You laughed when Hillary Clinton cried
You wish that Miley had rabies
And, oh, since when did you decide,
That Regis Philbin eats babies

Ok, we get it, don't you see
We've heard enough about that
Daniel Day-Lewis cast in every movie
And jokes about Rosie being fat

But there is one joke you never kill
Or who cares even if you do
Mock his hair, his face, his acting skill
But please never stop mocking Keanu

-------------------------------------------------------
End of article, ignore this link yo- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Bobby and Tyler
Like this Post? Read More from Bobby and Tyler.

- Ask him if he's got a "bag"
- Make koolaid
- Say the pledge of allegiance
- Challenge his pastor to backyard wrestling
- Ask about his "brother" or his middle name

Coming next week- Improper Etiquette with John McCain





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article yo, ignore this link- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

egress \EE-gress\, intransitive verb:
1. To go out; to depart; to leave.

- What's more frightening: Obama's plans to haphazardly egress from Iraq or the risk of McCain involuntarily egressing from a state of consciousness.

- The world was devastated by Jeff Probst's announcement that he would egress from his role as host of Survivor.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, I will immediately egress from this household if you keep doing that!
Oh shut it Becky! I promised new paint on the walls that would reflect the sunniness of our relationship, so damnit I'm givin' it to you!

Johnny Depp slated to play Riddler in next Batman and Philip Seymour Hoffman rumored to be Penguin

Are these choices too predictable whereas Ledger was a complete surprise? Are these actors good enough that it doesn't really matter? Does anyone else want to see Daniel Day-Lewis take Christian Bale's role as Batman, not for acting purposes, but because he would method-act it to the point of completely eradicating the threat of terrorism around the world?

LEAVE A COMMENT!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“Her father is doing what a good parent would do, but that doesn't help the paparazzi"

- Bonnie Fuller, former editor of Star Magazine and Us Weekly, commenting on the new 'boring' Britney Spears being kept out of the lime light by her father.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Mr. Simpson and you are forced to throw yourself into the oncoming train in order to save Ashlee and Jessica who were playing a game of 'cover your ears and eyes while holding your breath on a train track'.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are the head of a secret organization that has paid paparazzi to drug-up Amy Winehouse and is solely responsible for her smoking 12 packs of cigarettes a day since the age of 7.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Michael Lohan trying to take the negative attention off of your daughter Lindsay by revealing your less attractive illegitimate child.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Wilco - Jesus Etc.mp3
The Shins - Pink Bullets.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

Yes, this is quite a contrast from my usual writings about TV, movies, and other fairly trivial subjects. But after reading an article on cnn.com, I felt moved to speak out a little bit and share what I think is still a living, breathing controversy in this nation. Racism is not the issue it was in years past; many Americans have undergone great lengths to ensure that all citizens have equal rights regardless of their ethnic background. Slavery has been outlawed, we have equal voting rights, and the Jim Crow laws are nothing more than an unfortunate memory. And not too long ago, we achieved a new milestone in this fight when Barack Obama became the first African-American nominated for presidential candidacy.

But with every head we sever from the hydra that racism is, new ones grow in its place, subtler and more delicate than the conflicts of the past.

They do not pose the same threats to equality that the older issues spawned, but they daily affect the lives of all Americans, creating unnecessary barriers between different groups of people and proving the beast has not been slain. Over the years, I have heard numerous jokes stimulated by racial stereotypes that many find funny, but leave others hurt and offended. I have had friends in high school who were forbidden by parents to date because one was black and the other was white. The results of Affirmative Action programs have led to accusations of reverse discrimination. These occurrences generate hatred towards others for superficial reasons and divide us unnecessarily.

On July 9th, cnn.com published an article reporting that Rev. Jesse Jackson had apologized for the rude remarks he made in reference to Sen. Barack Obama. I write this post not because of Jackson’s apology or even his initial remarks for which he had to apologize, but because of what else was included in the article. The article mentions that this comment was not the first time Jackson criticized the Democratic presidential nominee; it referred to a South Carolina newspaper that reported that he had accused Obama of “acting like he’s white”. In addition to that, Ralph Nader, who has chosen to run for president yet again, accused Obama for “attempting to talk white”.

What baffles me is when did a skin color become a type of personality? Sure, I’ve heard people say things to this effect before, but they were ignorant immature individuals from my high school, so I paid it no mind. However, when such comments come from grown men who have believed themselves worthy enough to attempt to become the leader of our nation, something is seriously wrong. Public statements like these only serve to fuel stereotypes about ethnicity. Since I wasn’t exactly sure what Jackson meant by “acting white”, I combed the rest of the article to get an idea; his other major criticism of Obama is that he apparently talks down to other black people. Is that what “acting white” means? Talking down to black people? If so, it’s a terrible misrepresentation, because I know I, and countless other white individuals, do not treat blacks as such. The thought has never even crossed my mind to talk down to anyone because they had a different skin color than me.

Now don’t get me wrong; if the Illinois Senator is talking down to his fellow African-Americans, Jackson, as well as anyone else, has every right to have a problem with that, but don’t pass it off as “acting white”. Call the problem what it is, and certainly don’t do exactly what you’re accusing someone else of doing: stereotyping a group of people. All it does it creates division where none is needed and contradicts the ideals of unity for which America stands.

Clearly, it is going to be a long time, if ever, before racism is finally killed, and in the near future, we will see the terrible beast emerge with a new head. It is very possible that we could have a black president for the next four or eight years, and while some people can accept that just as easily as they can a white president, there will be those who cannot, subjecting us to a new side to racism that we have not seen before.

It is unfortunate that this is going to happen, but it is something for which we must be prepared. I only ask that each of you be cognizant of how these judgments, no matter how trivial or small they may appear, can truly affect our relationships with one other. Please help to fight the monster, so that it may one day be finally slain.

Once again, here is the article I am referring to:
Jesse Jackson apologizes for 'crude' Obama remarks
MORE»

It's the middle of the summer and while I like to read as much as the next person, sometimes all I desire for is something engaging to look at. So this weeks snippet of random stuff I've come across on digg.com is dedicated to those images that have calmed my frenzied mind, ranging from rather simply entertaining, to that which is utterly moving.

What would happen if your soul escaped?

An entire life caught on film.

Explosm.com, the best kind of offensive!

Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Death defying visionary makes art as hardcore as can be.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate link, click here, yo- MORE»

If You Could Live In Any Fantasy World...
a. Narnia - 8%
b. Oz - 8%
c. Middle Earth - 13%
d. Hogwarts - 70%

There was obviously a misunderstanding here. All I said was "live" in any fantasy world. You foolish squibs! Take your dirty mudblood selves out of Hogwarts! No one there loves you, you are the prime target of He Who Shall Not Be Named, and you fail out of every class because you can't even bend a spoon. Just Kidding! Sorta. Either way, I guess I'm not really surprised by the overwhelming support of Harry and company, it was a bit expected when this question was oh-so-wisely crafted. Then again, I'm shocked to see Oz and Narnia tied. I mean come on; Dorothy and Glinda were pretty hot, and if the singing gets annoying you could just remove the Tin Man's face, slay the Lion with it, and cover the bodies with the Scarecrow's limbs. Well, in tribute to the epic victory, I present to you the trailer for Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince! I'm happy to see that they continue to head in a darker direction, and that quick cut-scenes of Voldemort continue to make him look like a badass 80s rock star.



New Poll: An Actual Question
Considering the controversy surrounding human rights violations in China, should the United States participate in the Beijing Olympics?

a. Yes
b. No

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

Have some midday tunes:
Cold War Kids - Something Is Not Right With Me.mp3
One Day As A Lion - Wild International.mp3
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window, click here- MORE»

sesquipedalian \ses-kwuh-puh-DAYL-yuhn\, adjective:
1. Given to or characterized by the use of long words.

- "Please, just stay back m'am and never fear, 'Efficacious tax-deductable transactions' is my middle name!" shouted the broker whose parents had a sick sesquipedalian tendency.

- Jean-Claude Van Damme quickly scanned the script, deemed it far too sesquipedalian, kick-boxed the shit out of everyone on the stage, and demanded that his agent never disrespect him again by trying to put him in another show by this 'Shakespeare' asshole.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Can't you just have a normal conversation with me? Why do you have to get all sesquipedalian and off-subject?!
Supercalifragilisticshutyourmouthori'llkillyoubecky.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I don't see why people are so negative"

- Zhang Ziyi, star of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, dismayed by the protests against the Beijing Olympics.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Zhang Ziyi and you aren't aware that you're talking about China.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Zhang Ziyi and you don't care about black people.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Zhang Ziyi and you obviously haven't seen this video.

A late night tune to keep you up with us:
We Are Scientists - Impatience.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

Bill Maher's October 3rd, 2008 release documentary "Religulous," directed by none other than the forces that brought you Borat, arrives just in time for election season. Since the idea of separation of church and state has apparently flown out the window, Americans not only have to worry about Presidential candidates policies for the struggling economy, war in Iraq, and homeland security, but also must take into consideration the nominees religious convictions as well. Maher, a self-proclaimed "rationalist", tries to approach this taboo subject with as unbiased a mentality as can be mustered by a man who equates God with Santa Claus, regarding all subject matter with a candid sense of humor. Not an inch of American landscape seems to have escaped the parasitic nature of religious folk, as Maher goes on a continental trek across our country to seek further understanding of the reasoning behind such powerful convictions to that which is intangible. Still, amidst the criticism one must remember why this documentary was able to be created here in the first place - while we may have damned ourselves to forever being one nation under God, we are still one nation under the sacrament of freedom.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window click here- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

It's hard to set standards anymore. Questions that used to have clear answers have become intensely vague, blurry lines abound. What is inappropriate for television, what is inappropriate for children, what is the limit on the amount of films Brendan Fraser can simultaneously appear in? Let's try to make a little sense of all this, together.

Not too long ago my brother showed me this commercial that was banned from TV. As you'll see, it promoted the "Smart Car" by showing all the 'risks' of having a back seat, and thus why it is much wiser to remain gas efficient and drive in a trendy little two-seater. Of course there's the obvious 'risks' of being hit by any car that is even remotely normal-sized, thus immediately crushing your 'smart car' and swiftly ending your life. Moving forward- why was this commercial banned?

Well, realistically, it's frightening... but it's more than that. We've all seen commercials for horror films; we cringe, turn our heads away the slightest bit, and wonder why this has appeared on our screen between portions of Sex and the City reruns that we watch every night at 11. Most notably of late were the commercials for "The Strangers", an oddly effective ad campaign that had a way with really scaring off unsuspecting viewers. These ran cleanly all over, but I think they appealed to a very similar sense of fear that this banned commercial does.

There was definitely something oddly possible about "The Strangers," and for whatever reason, most of us (I would wager) feel the same way about this Smart Car commercial. Come on, admit it, you check the back of your car before you enter it at night. You locked the doors, or maybe you didn't, who knows what's back there. We've all heard random urban legends of flashing lights and men with knives, of looking up and seeing a face in your rear view mirror.

My original thought was that it was deemed inappropriate for kids to see. But I think we can all attest to the fact that children today are exposed to violence at a very young age. Whether or not there's anything wrong with that is a completely different issue, but the point is-- this can't be about them. This is about us.

A person being killed in a car. Sure, it's a rough premise for a commercial, a cheap way to rile our senses no doubt, but is it worth banning? Is it really that different than all the other forms of sexual or violent advertising that graces our television screens on a daily basis? When it comes down to it, I think it's fair to say that this fear, somehow deeply ingrained in our collective thought, overruled this commercial.

As to the other question at hand: Obviously all respect for that limit has been completely thrown out the window-- as of August 1, Brendan Fraser will be starring in two sub-par films simultaneously. What is this world coming to? MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

pusillanimous \pyoo-suh-LAN-uh-muhs\, adjective:
1. Lacking in courage and resolution; contemptibly fearful; cowardly.

- George Bush wisely made the decision to refrain from using the word 'pusillanimous' to describe terrorists, because even if it is a conveniently descriptive term, he knew that there was approximately a code orange threat of him giggling immediately after saying it.

- Howie Mandel is a merciless OCD monster who preys on the pusillanimous of society with his bald head and the ever-blunt question: Deal or no Deal?

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick you pusillanimous fool!
You shut your mouth Becky. You can mock my inexplicable fear of adorable woodland creatures, but don't you dare attack my manhood.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

-Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“It seems like it's been on, like, longer"

- Miley Cyrus intelligently commenting on the length of her series "Hannah Montana" as it may be nearing an end.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Joey Fatone on a live infomercial for Swedish Penis Pumps and you cannot believe that the change was so drastic in such a short amount of time.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are someone with an odd fetish for fat grown-man boys and after watching only a mere 22 episodes of the Andy Milonakis Show, it seems like you've been provided with a lifetime of pleasure

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Paris Hilton in 1998, shocked to hear that it's only been 6 hours since Laurence Fishburne first placed his bald head on your knee cap for an official pre-production experiment to test if sexual arousal can be attained from minimal contact with the soon-to-be Matrix star's cranium, because if so, they wouldn't have been able to cast Keanu Reeves as the lead.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Cold War Kids - Saint John.mp3
Koushik - Lying in the Sun.mp3
GZA - Alphabets.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window-- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Arian Murati
Check out Arian's current band Pushing Mongo and download their latest EP Nature vs. Nurture. Or read more posts by Arian.

The year is 2005. The band is called Pollywog. The venue is in Montclair, NJ. We were called up to play at the last minute, because another band had dropped. (Note to bands, if you drop out of a show at the last minute, don't expect to ever play there again.) Now, I've seen some disgusting venues over the past 7 or so years, but this was putrid. The bathroom door was hanging by its last hinge. I had to hold it closed with one hand, and...well, myself, with the other. Of course there was urine all over the floor and "fuck you" on the wall, what kind of cliché rock venue would it be otherwise? Anyway, before the show, my singer went outside to have a cigarette, and I was inside with a friend. Out of what seemed to be thin air, a man with a Black Flag tattoo, no shirt, and a handheld camcorder came over to us and asked, "Hey, you guys are 18 right?" It was fairly obvious that I wasn't, but I said yes anyway. He clearly didn't care. He turned on his camera and turned it to us. " I run a small website when I'm not on tour" he says to us. We start watching the tiny screen, only to see a young woman receiving, um, a money shot is what I think they call it in the biz. He turned the camera off, and just walked off, as if he does this everywhere he goes, which actually wouldn't surprise me.

My singer came back inside, I told him about the whole ordeal, and his first words were, "Yeah, I already saw that. He was just outside." So that proved my point, he really did just go around showing everyone. You just get used to meeting these kinds of people after a few years of shows. Eventually, you just tune them out and go about your own business. The show itself was actually pretty good, we played a solid set, and the crowd was digging it. Still, that particular band would see its demise. The others were getting too into the Sex Pistols, and I was much more interested in Pearl Jam. We actually played that venue again about a week before the band officially went its separate ways. We arrived at the place, only to be greeted with a sign on the door that said, "Closed due to water damage". Really? A place that attracted drug dealers, amateur pornographers, and sleazy punk bands closed because of water damage? I went home and checked my email, and saw that they emailed me a few days prior to that night, and said that the show was canceled. The others were already furious, so I didn't tell them that I didn't check my mail. I just sided with them and pretended to be angry that they didn't compensate us for it.

So, this comes to the lesson of the day: Professionalism. Always show up to the shows you promised to play. I know this sounds like common sense, but you'd be surprised how many bands think that they can just cancel the day before and expect to play the next week. The venue loses money, the promoter won't book you, and there is always another band looking to take your spot. Sell your ticket minimum, don't throw your cigarette butts on the promoter's car (whoops), and always, ALWAYS be courteous. I don't care how "Br00tal" your band is, if you're not nice when booking a show, say goodbye to getting the empty slot.

Some of the commenters from the last post wanted to know where I am playing next:

I am playing a festival in Nyack, NY on August 9th with Big D and the Kids Table, The Number 12 Looks Like You, and many more acts. Tickets are available at inacanproductions.com, or through myself. You can find more information on www.myspace.com/pushingmongo.

Next week: Going to big shows, dealing with concert security (No PCP in the venue? What?!), and how to not get your ass kicked for hitting on the wrong person's girlfriend.
MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

As you all know, it is a rare situation where we will post a single link as the basis of an article on PopSense. But, as a member of the internet community that increasingly relies on your participation, I find this to be absolutely worthy of posting. I want to give a special thanks to Ted Shiel for sending this link my way as a result of our recent "Ode to Debunking the Dark Knight as the Greatest Film of All Time"(as voted by IMDB).

So yeah, check this out and feel free to leave comments here to discuss this issue--
When the "Wisdom of Crowds" turns on itself: IMDB Edition

After you read it, here's the latest figures of votes for The Godfather as of 7/28:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view this in a separate window, click here- MORE»

The Best Elderly Male Television Personality Is...
Bob Barker - 32%
Alex Trebek - 29%
Regis Philbin - 17%
Larry King - 20%

Bob Barker was the first Chuck Norris, just ask Happy Gilmore. An early push for Trebek made it look like the king of deadpan comedy and random facts was going to run away with this one, but Barker swiftly informed him that the price was wrong, bitch. Infamous host of the non-stop-action news show Larry King (barely a)live fell to third, proving yet again that PopSense readers demand their news come from people under the age of 113. In a shocking last place was the morning macdaddy Regis Philbin. Despite working daily with the most annoying MILF on the planet, even Regis' baby-eating ways couldn't land him a top slot. Rock on Barker, even in retirement, grannies everywhere are fantasizing about you.

New Poll: We're not in Kansas anymore
If you could live in any fantasy world...
a. Narnia
b. Oz
c. Middle Earth
d. Hogwarts

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

Enjoy some midday tunes:
Cold War Kids - We Used to Vacation.mp3
Dr. Dog - My Old Ways.mp3
CSS - Rat is Dead.mp3
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

leitmotif \LYT-moh-teef\, noun:
1. A dominant and recurring theme.

- Nickelback's success can be attributed to their subtle use of leitmotifs.

- No matter what degree of talent the show attracts, American Idol will remain popular for the leitmotif of cold hearted, silly British men telling everyone that they suck.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, should we even bother?
What, you mean paying the water company so that our children can at least live even if we don't feed them on a regular basis? I really don't think... Ohhh wait! You mean fulfilling the daily leitmotif where you ask a vague question with a big word in it and then I reveal something terrible that I do to you or the family for no apparent reason. Nah, let's skip it today.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

If you missed last week's post, PopSense will be observing the sabbath and resting our tired bloggy asses once a week. To keep you busy, we've posted our 10 hottest articles from the week and a little mix to keep your hip heads a-boppin' for the day. Also, thanks to the incomparable Garrett Kolanda, we've attached a photo to prove once and for all that Andrea Mitchell looks exactly like the goat from the Sound of Music.

Hot Posts 7/21-7/26
- An Ode to Debunking the Dark Knight as The Greatest Film
- Fun with Video Responses: Eww!
- Facebook: Trendy Fad or Factor of the Future?
- McConaughey's Baby Penis: Quote of the Day 7/23
- Thank You Miley Cyrus
- Improper Etiquette with Bobby and Tyler: Samuel L. Jackson
- Movie Preview Review - Kabluey
- Redefining the Snap Shot
- Can You Digg It?
- Superfool: Cultural Conclusions 7/23

Pseudo Silent Sunday Mix 7/27
1. Conor Oberst - Cape Canaveral.mp3 (Removed per request of label)
2. Grizzly Bear - Two Weeks.mp3
3. Cold War Kids - Hang me up to Dry.mp3
4. The Morning Benders - Grain of Salt.mp3
5. Bodies of Water - These are the Eyes.mp3
6. Dr. Dog - The Rabbit, The Bat, And The Deer.mp3
7. Black Kids - Hit the Heartbreaks.mp3
8. Lykke Li - Little Bit.mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili, Jeff Luppino-Esposito, and Ali Starzyk

“He couldn't stand working with her and not being with her. He's too upset."

- An unspecified source close to Justin Long (the Mac guy in Mac vs. PC commercials) explaining why the actor chose to drop out of the upcoming roller-derby comedy "Whip It!" directed by his ex-girlfriend Drew Barrymore.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are describing the hell that your client, playing the role of Mr. Big, is going through as the only normal sized person in the cast of the midget version of Sex and the City.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are justifying your friend's decision to stop filming a photoshopped version of "Breakfast at Tiffany's" because even the green screen makes him wish Audrey was there with him.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Daniel Day-Lewis' agent and Daniel has taken his method-acting to a new extreme by refusing to play opposite the leading lady if she won't sleep with him in preparation for the role.

Are you Mac or PC? Leave a comment and tell us, then enjoy these tunes!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Meriam Raouf
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by Meriam)

Miley,

Words can barely do justice to the amazing amount of pop-nonsense that you’ve brought to my life. I am trying only to watchSpongeBob in peace and enjoy his silly humor that so many claim is “satirical”, when your stupid commercial comes on. I thank you so much for bringing justice to the many girls in their tweens who want to feel good about themselves. Thank You for proving them wrong. Although you had nothing to do with the writing of it, I have to thank you for your most recent song (I doubt it’s legally even a song, more like an ungenuine* mix of previously created things). In your inspiring song called “Seven Things” you have not only convinced them that their lives revolve only around boys, but that they only exist in relation to men. Thanks for using words like “intertwined” when the destroyed girls crying in your video are only about ten!

And not only is the song the greatest thing I’ve ever heard, a disaster of music that damages my existence, it has such a creative title! I think if you Google “ten things I hate about you” you might find a movie with Julia Stiles that was made before you were ever born. I know, it’s weird that there was a time before you existed.

It’s great that even though you have trouble pretending you can make music you can use old music like “Sunglasses at Night” put to lyrics of old movies you’ve probably never seen, you still manage to produce crap for our viewing and masturbating pleasure. But who am I kidding? You probably had almost nothing to do with the making of that song anyway. I just feel bad for Cory Hart. He wrote that back in 1984 (that’s pronounced nineteen eighty four so you know) and you copied it and made more money (I think you know what that is, it’s that green shit that allows you to buy more slutty clothing).

Not only have you provided terrible music in my life, but you’re also making money off of it! Good for you. (which your “dad” probably uses to buy more fake mustaches.) I’m so glad you’re maybe one of the worst role models and pop stars I’ve ever seen. Your music is completely painful in the way that it possesses so little creativity in lyrics (the words, honey) and even less so in music.

And just when you have all these little girls loyally following you, and crying in your music videos, you have merchandise. DAMN! Nothing like some good old materials to fill the void that they have because of the no-boyfriends they have right now. So now, because these girls are feeling bad because they’re chubby or because their noses aren’t shaped like the one on your sad excuse for a face, they’re crying. But the Hannah Montana (I LOVE that you have multiple names! I’ll thank you for that later dear) Kleenex box will be helpful in making her feel better. If not, she can always play with her Hannah Dawn Cyrus Michael Jackson Montana Miley Destiny Hope dolls!

I must thank you for being a washed out version of Britney Spears. Thanks so much for changing into a slut while millions of adoring fans (mostly pedophiles and little girls. nice demographic!) watch you do it. You took advantage of Disney by slowly making the ever-famous and smooth transition from child star to slutty excuse for an actress.

Now, as promised, I will thank you for your million names. You’ve introduced a whole generations to crappy songs about nothing. They will later be embarrassed when they still have them memorized. So, just when they think you’re a child star, you’re a slut, and vice versa. So if they weren’t already confused about your identities, you have like 8 million equally disgusting names to even further confuse them. You talk about how secure you are (you should be, you’re perfect) and yet you keep hiding from yourself. You have many identities, and just as many wigs (if not more) and you know what would really help? Playing with your dolls! Or you know what would help more? Pouring out your heart in another teen magazine! And another naked picture to boot!

Not only do we get to find out about you in magazines, shows, posters and annoying concerts with the Jonas brothers, but now you have the nerve to bash other Disney stars on YouTube (Demi Lovato of Camp Rock, & Selena Gomez of Wizards of Waverly Place). Thanks so much for proving you’re not even a little close to funny when without the Disney writers backing you up. It’s so great that you feel you can have a scotch (who are we kidding, you’re more of an apple martini kinda girl) and get on YouTube to bash others! What a role model! Shows all that confidence you were talking about.

Thank you so much for all that you do. You may be only a banana peel on a giant pile of shit the media creates to distract us from the real news, but it’s helping honey! Thank you so much! For pretending to be real! For it all! And thanks for wasting my time and thought as I wrote about this! I couldn’t help it, I love you that much.

Forever Yours,
Meriam
MORE»

It's my Nana's Birthday today, so Ali and I decided to bust out a version of the classic Frank Sinatra-Natalie Cole duet, "They Can't Take That Away From Me." My Nana is a huge Sinatra fan, especially since her maiden name actually is Sinatra (ah, if only I inherited that voice), but yeah I hope you all find this adorable, I promised her I'd post it on the website so here it is!

Heads up for later today: A great letter from guest writer Meriam Raouf to Miley Cyrus! MORE»

- Stelios Phili, Jeff Luppino-Esposito, and Ali Starzyk

diadem \DY-uh-dem\, noun:
1. A crown

- Can you really ever be too old to wear the diadem of Burger King on your birthday?

- When Chris Martin ruled the world, he had an extremely flexible diadem that was built to stay on his head despite the massive turbulence caused by his wild dance moves.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, why must you walk around here with your proverbial diadem and scepter, treating me like some sort of peasant!
Bah humbug Becky! Peasant?! The only labor I let you go through is during pregnancy!

Some Morning Tunes:
The Avett Brothers - Will You Return?.mp3
The Morning Benders - Damnit Anna.mp3
Little Pictures - This House Can Fit Us All.mp3
Lykke Li - Dance. Dance. Dance..mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I would keep it the same day, just make it a holiday."

- Kirsten Dunst plugging an upcoming documentary she will be directing entitled "Why Tuesday" which delves into the really important question of why Americans vote on a Tuesday.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Mr. Burns explaining to Smithers exactly how to make his next birthday party more bitchin'.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are the leader of the second generation of the People's Temple cult and you decide to switch from Koolaid to Gatorade, but keep everything else pretty much the same.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Bono attempting to become more in touch with the starving African children that you have been trying to save by propositioning Congress to consider recognizing an ancient holiday that the natives call "Kwanzaa".

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Liz Durrett - Wild as Them.mp3
Bound Stems - Happens to Us All Otherwise.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Bobby and Tyler
Like this Post? Read More from Bobby and Tyler.

5 things not to do when going to the library with Dane Cook...

- Engage in ANY conversation what so ever
- Ask him if he's ever listened to Mitch Hedberg
- Tell him you wish the piercings/tattoos he had in "Waiting" were real
- Take out a cashew and say "prove it"
- Inquire if "Employee of the Month" is on blue-ray


Forget about the fact that you once actually liked Dane Cook and enjoy some evening tunes!
The Morning Benders - Boarded Doors.mp3
Bodies of Water - I Guess We'll Forget the Sound, I Guess, I Guess.mp3
Dr. Dog - Ain't it Strange.mp3
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Pearl Ho reporting from Hong Kong

About three years ago the term ‘lomography’ suddenly became used in everyday conversation amongst my friends and peers. Not until about three days ago, did I truly come to understand what it really is. I’ve got to admit that all throughout these three years, each time I pass by a little counter selling these oddly shaped cameras, a small voice inside my head told me to go ahead and look at them, buy one, buy one and then buy a fish eye lens, then perhaps buy the Diana Flash as well, oooh and also the red/blue/yellow flash, OH! and the little vignette maker that’s quite cool isn’t it – but that would add up to about four to five hundred US dollars. I also must admit that each time another voice in my head would be telling me “oh come on, you don’t want to be hoi polloi, fight this, fight this urge, Pearl you are totally above these silly hip trends”. So I suppose I did make a very hard and conscious effort to try to be different by not falling for this marketing ploy and only three days ago did I become truly grateful that I did.

The reason I finally decided to sit down and read about lomography's history was because I actually almost gave in to buying a Holga camera (now also owned by Lomography), particularly, the multi-coloured one because I am a superficial bitch. Like all the others, it is made with terribly cheap material but sold at remarkably high prices.

This camera first caught my attention when a friend at UVA had it round her neck while we were waiting at the bus stop. She took two photos of me without my consent and obviously that angers a typical girl who only wants to look pretty in a photo. She laughs, and then went on to expain that one should never think about it, just shoot the photo, and that would capture life as it is, beautiful, spontaeneous, a complete work of art.

However, to me that was not art. I immediately remembered my sneaky condescending attitude towards Lomography. Photography – real photography, as in not the digital kind where you can take a photo, look at it, not like it, take it again – is about composition and balance.

Balance of light, of colour, of positive and negative space. Lomography’s website, however, teaches you that you don’t even need to look at your subject matter, you don’t need to think about what comes out let alone even care to look at what comes out. I always thought that, because photography is done with film and that you can capture a moment in so many lights and angles and ways, shouldn’t you search for the best way to portray that very moment first?

You’ve got one photo to show the world something you see – you would want to think about it beforehand. I am not disagreeing with the philosophy that sometimes you DO just want to shoot and be spontaeneous simply for the sake of knowing you captured that very moment of an exhilarating and fast paced life, simply for the sake of memories. But to develop the photos, put them in a gallery and display them as art is another matter.

Editor's Note: While this craze has clearly already swept Hong Kong, I'd like to just throw a warning out there for all of you in the States; The kings of cool at Urban Outfitters are now bringing you Lomography. I just want Polaroid back!! MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Which site do you spend (waste) the most time on?
a. Myspace - 2%
b. Perez Hilton - 11%
c. YouTube - 22%
d. Facebook - 62%

Resisting internationally-accepted rankings that place YouTube as the third most popular site on the web in the US, then Myspace, and THEN Facebook, PopSense readers showed just how hip they really are. If those facts don't prove it, then just the mere truth that only one fool chose Myspace pretty much guarantees our level of awesomeness. It's also nice to see that you're getting your culture news from us instead of Perez! But let's talk about something more important while we're on the subject: The New Facebook Layout!! Go to new.facebook.com to see your page set up in the new format. Obviously we'll be writing about this in the near future; celebrating the cool new photo set up, getting upset at the way they've blended the wall with your mini-feed, and discussing the implications of moving some vital information off of your front page. Oo, I'm so giddy! This reminds us of our first time on Facebook and the 5 things we learned not to do the hard way.

New Poll: Double Jeopardy!
The Best Elderly Male Television Personality Is...
a. Bob Barker
b. Alex Trebek
c. Regis Philbin
d. Larry King

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili, Jeff Luppino-Esposito, and Ali Starzyk

sempiternal \sem-pih-TUR-nuhl\, adjective:
1. Of never ending duration; having beginning but no end; everlasting; endless.

- Ah yes, the semipiternal question of our era - Conjunction, junction, what is your function?

- Who could forget the sempiternal feud from Season 1 of the OC between Ryan's brains and Ryan's uncontrollable fists of fury.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
And thus, Derrick, began my sempiternal state of misery.
Oh Becky, why you gotta talk about our wedding day like that? I'd say it started when I first found you on the internet and posed as a 14 year old girl to lure you into my lair.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

-Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“It'll be good to preside over what is sure to be only vaguely coordinated televised insanity."

- Russel Brand, co-star of "Forgetting Sarah Marshall", anticipating his upcoming task of hosting the MTV Video Music Awards.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Alex Trebek and the producers have just informed you that they are speeding up the "Final Jeopardy" music so that it fits in 45 seconds instead of a minute, and you know shits about to get crazy.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Nick Lachey making a last stand in the name of stardom by accepting the hosting job for Fox's latest reality TV show "Bellevue Busters: When midgets and zoo animals attempt to rescue patients from your local insane asylum, things don't go as planned"

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are John Travolta, pissed about the fact that Pierce Brosnan is stealing the musical-movie limelight from you, and you decide to launch a viral self-promotional marketing campaign by leaving the camera on during your daily routine as MC of an all-out brawl between freshly slaughtered prom kings and queens dressed up in costumes from "Grease", hurling baby's knee caps and cow droppings at one another by way of Kevin Bacon's secret mastery of the human marionette.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Parts & Labor - Nowheres Nigh.mp3
The Avett Brothers - Will You Return?.mp3
These United States - West Won.mp3
The Avett Brothers - Murder in the City.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

In response to IMDB's users ranking 'The Dark Knight' as the number one film of all time.

UPDATE: The fans have gone even further

Please don't be mistaken
For i enjoyed the movie, you see
But what brought my heart to achin'
Was its status on IMDB

I saw the movie at the mall
And trust I loved the Joker
But what's with Maggie Gyllenhaal
And that random Asian Broker

Every theater rightfully booked
But let's just face the facts
Two Face Harvey sorta looked
Like the alien from Mars Attacks

This was a thriller, a deserving hit
I'm in love with Christian Bale
But he was underused you must admit
And he may end up in jail

When we left the IMAX feeling gay
Many scurried off to pee
I heard one eager grandma say
"Why wasn't it in 3-D!?"

The Greatest Movie of all time?
You really must be clueless
You'd need more plot and way less crime
Plus the Penguin as Daniel Day-Lewis

Like this Ode? Try another!

Hate this Ode? Have some music!
Tracy Shedd - Whatever It Takes.mp3
The Golden Filter - Solid Gold.mp3
Parenthetical Girls - A Song for Ellie Greenwich.mp3
The Avett Brothers - The Ballad of Love and Hate.mp3
The Avett Brothers - Die Die Die.mp3
-----------------------------------------
End of article, please ignore this link- MORE»

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

For as much as I love superheroes, I must say that most of them would be nothing without their evil, law-breaking counterparts. The plot of any superhero story is often centered around the acts and motives of his villain, leaving the writers of the tale the exciting challenge of creating much of the external conflict in a single dynamic character.

However, the earlier movies of this super-powered summer did not necessarily follow this format. In the case of Iron-Man and The Incredible Hulk, the heroes spent most of the story fighting against an army of no-name enemies, leading up to a climactic fight against another major character who had acquired abilities similar to the hero; Tony Stark took out terrorists and then had an iron-suit duel with his former business partner, and Bruce Banner tossed U.S military soldiers like rag dogs before taking down the one soldier who had become the Abomination. The story in Hancock was engineered in such a way that anyone one could call a villain played a fairly minor role; it was simply a slew bank robbers and escaped jailbirds.

However, the last two superhero movies of the summer proved to have excellent villains, ones with evil schemes and a cunning ability to, as the Green Goblin so elegantly put it, attack the heart. In Hellboy II: The Golden Army, we meet Prince Nuada, a non-aging exile in the fantastical underworld who comes to take revenge on humanity for breaking an ancient truce with his people. In the first half of the movie, I enjoyed watching his storyline play out much more than I did the heroes, as Nuada, after training for years on end, fought his way through magical being and human alike in order to track down the three pieces to his father’s crown which would give him control of the unstoppable Golden Army. He later makes our heroes question their actions, telling Hellboy that humanity will never accept him and convincing Hellboy’s sidekick Abe Sapien to hand over the last piece of the crown to save the woman he loves. So why not just kill the evil badass? Unfortunately, he shares a powerful connection to his twin sister Princess Nuala, with whom Abe has fallen in love. Any pain one feels, so does the other, meaning if the Prince is killed, so is the Princess. Here’s a story ripe with conflict from the very villain alone.

Yet, Prince Nuada does not hold a candle to the ever infamous Joker played by the late Heath Ledger, who gave the best performance of his life in this film. As I sat in the crowded movie theater on The Dark Knight’s opening day, I thought I was going to have nightmares about how creepy, psychotic, and just plain evil the Joker was. Throughout the course of the movie he terrorizes Gotham City by turning its citizens on each other, starting with a bank robbery in which he orders his accomplices to kill one another. He challenges Batman to reveal his true identity to the city and threatens that until he does so, people will die. Through a series of sadistic mind games, the Joker spreads chaos throughout the city, including an incident where he wires two ferries with explosives and tells the people on each that the only to save themselves is to blow up the other boat. He turns one of Gotham’s beloved heroes into a terrible villain almost as disturbing as the Joker himself, and he sets a trap in which he dresses his hostages as his accomplices in hope that the police will kill them not knowing who they really are.

But the worst part about the Joker and all his evil schemes is his motive: he’s just doing it for fun. He’s not in it for the money, he’s not seeking any sort of revenge, he’s not power-hungry to rule the world, he’s just bored and looking for a way to entertain himself.

Needless to say, I am happy to see the summer of superhero movies close out on such a powerful note with such incredible villains. These diabolical masterminds give us a reason to cheer on the heroes we love and them the good guys great every time they vanquish the forces of evil. It is unfortunate that now we won’t see any new on the big screen for now, but I’m just relieved to know I can satisfy my super-powered hero/villain fix in the near future when NBC’s Heroes returns with a new season chock full of never-before-seen bad guys.

MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

melange \may-LAHNZH\, noun:
1. A mixture; a medley.

- Eddie Murphy's career has become a sickening melange of fat suits and shameless narcissism that usually yields too many characters played by Murphy and a too few sympathetic laughs from the audience.

- No Keith Richards, that's not a melange of 'Gimme Shelter' and 'Start me Up,' that's marijuana laced with cocaine!

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Don't call it meat loaf Derrick! You know how that makes me feel... it's my "Mediterranean Melange of Meats"
Ohh, well, ok then Becky, let me rephrase: The dog must be allergic to your "Mediterranean Melange of Meats" because he just threw up my entire portion all over the couch, which also happens to be our bed... and dinner table.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“Come here, little man. I saw the pecker and screamed that we'd been right all along about him being a boy."

- Matthew McConaughey describing the birthing process of his new son Levi Alves McConaughey.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Steve Irwin and you have spent the last 3 months trying to discover the gender of the freakish part-human, part-alligator that your wife miraculously birthed.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are someone with a very strong stomach and a surprising sense of humor while watching the Verne Troyer sex tape.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are a 5-year-old Dick Cheney celebrating with all your friends about an epic discovery you conveniently stumble upon by pantsing a young Hillary Clinton.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Calexico - Convict Pool.mp3
Conor Oberst - Moab.mp3(Removed per request of label)
Ra Ra Riot - Suspended in Gaffa.mp3
Lackthereof - Tongues O' Fire.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window-- MORE»

This one was made in response to a question posed by sxephil: Have you ever walked in on your parents doing something that scarred you?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view post in a separate window click here- MORE»

Because I have much too much time on my hands, and not enough to fill it with, I've come to cure the ailment of boredom by turning to a wonderful website, www.digg.com, and have been provided with literally hours of entertainment. So here, my similarly unoccupied internet brethren, are five things that have caught my eye in the past couple of days.

1) A ten year olds plea for advice about dropping out of school answered, serial killer style.

2) I mean, if sharks can get away with it, why can't we?

3) Attention Cheese and Sauce Consuming Beasts: When Domino's is repulsed by your eating habits, you have to know something, somewhere, has gone terribly wrong.

4) So you said you hated The Dark Knight and now everyone hates you.

5) Cracked.com laughs in the face of death.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, to view in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Who would play Superman if it were redone today?
a. Ben Affleck - 26%
b. Jake Gyllenhaal - 42%
c. Sean Penn - 11%
d. Tom Cruise - 19%

Dear PopSense readers, I love you, thank you for humoring me. I'm not sure at what point during the process of composing this poll question that I decided to disregard the fact that there was a remake of Superman in 2006 starring Brandon Routh (no one I care about) that I probably saw but have just blocked out of my mind. In my defense, these sort of things tend to happen when Hollywood has a way with pretending that certain things never existed. A few months ago when I first saw a preview for Edward Norton's Hulk, I didn't pay attention to the first 20 minutes of the movie I was intending to see because I just sat there trying to figure out if I had just dreamed about seeing an updated version of the Hulk, or if reincarnation was real. Obviously, you all know the answer to this question, but as I sat there looking around the theatre nervously, waiting for some form of confirmation that I wasn't the only one who had just seen a shitty remake of the Hulk very recently, I think I decided to block out any other past superhero movies I had seen. That being said, y'all voted for Jake Gyllenhaal, strong decision definitely, I could see it. We all know Tom Cruise wouldn't be allowed to do it for Scientologist purposes, and Ben Affleck wouldn't do it unless Matt Damon got the role of Lois Lane. Oh, and while I was making excuses earlier about this poll question, I purposefully didn't include the fact that I made Sean Penn an option, because there really is no excuse for that.

New Poll: Other than PopSense...
Which site do you spend (waste) the most time on?
a. Myspace
b. Perez Hilton
c. YouTube
d. Facebook

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

Enjoy some midday tunes:
Sunfold - Sara The American Winter.mp3
The Avett Brothers - Murder in the City.mp3
Santogold - Starstruck (Diplo Remix).mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to view in separate window- MORE»

- Stelios Phili, Jeff Luppino-Esposito, and Ali Starzyk

vituperation \vy-too-puh-RAY-shuhn, -tyoo-\, noun:
1. Sustained and severely abusive language.

- Christian Bale's slightly unstable family accused him of various forms of vituperation, but let's be a serious for a second here, wouldn't you be angry if you were the batman... deal with it bitches, you're related to Christian Bale, that should heal any wounds and fill them with gold.

- "Why yes, 'vituperation' is, in fact, my second favorite word," replied V, who quickly added, "And so what if it is?? You vile, vicarious, voluminous, volatile, venetian bastard!"

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
How dare you Derrick?! Why all this endless vituperation?!
Becky, you've got it all wrong! Vituperation, as defined in my pocket Oxford, is usually limited to verbal abuse, but we all remember the time that Little Jimmy's 3rd grade teacher called home for the 'real' explanation behind his black eye... apparently 'barfight with a gorilla' doesn't hold up in school these days.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I'm just like you. I'm doing what I love and dating a boy."

- Jessica Simpson speaking to Texas country-concert goers upon being booed.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Amanda Bynes, dating some equally untalented 'celebrity', and writing the first draft to the feature length film, "Amanda Please!".

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Jessica Simpson and somewhere in your tuna-loving mind you actually believe that you are somehow similar (in socioeconomic status or conversely in intelligence) to the Texas country-concert goers.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Perez Hilton after an intense Victoria Beckham bashing session which would later culminate in a beautifully photo-shopped image of Posh with David Beckham's man juices dripping out of her nostrils.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Benji Hughes - Why Do These Parties Always End the Same Way?.mp3
RATATAT - Mumtaz Khan.mp3
Calexico - Two Silver Trees.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Stelios Phili EDITOR



Invoking the cosmic wonder of his beard and Bollywood, Devendra Banhart's latest music video is both a love story and a tongue-in-cheek nod to India's maharajas of yore. In "Carmensita," the newest single from his latest album, Smokey Rolls Down Thunder Canyon, Devandra and his uber-hot (and unlikely girlfriend) Natalie Portman get down to psychedelic-indie, all while saving the Kindom of Carmensita from the clutches of Lord Rajan the Malevolent. When taunting the Prince (played by Devendra), Lord Rajan bellows, "You think you can defeat me with your rebellious beard?" Later on, Devendra kills Lord Rajan by shooting venomous snakes out of his forehead. This is arguably 2008's most badass moment in music videos.

Devendra Banhart - Carmensita.mp3
Devendra Banhart - Seahorse.mp3
Devendra Banhart - The Body Breaks.mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End of article, click here to open in a separate window- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


Ok, so here's the general idea. Prepare yourself to answer these questions (as provided by Lauren Paullin on an email listserve). Just think out the answers in your head, don't worry about it, you don't have to remember it, just do it as fast as you can and respond with whatever comes to your mind first. Ok, ready? Go! 2+4= ?, 8+12=?, 15+32=?, 134+15=?, 156+2=?, Think of a color and a tool!

There ya go, did you think of a red hammer? If so, then you are (as the theory goes) within a 98% bracket of all people who take this test. Here's the problem, when Lauren posed this question to the listserve, not a single person responded with the red hammer. How could this be? Some projected that, since it was a theatre-geek listserve (FYP), this was merely a skewed result because these are inherently odd people. Tough to believe. Finally, the always-reliable Norman Gonzalo Reategui of Peru (after pretending to be in the 98%) expressed his discontent for not being in the majority and posed the age-old question: If "everyone" is special, is it not possible to think that no one really is? Touche Norman, a fair inquiry indeed. But I'll have none of that talk...

After Norman directly called me out, I felt it necessary to respond accordingly-

I would like to believe that I'm some incredibly unique being, but I'm gonna be straight forward here-- there is no way that all of FYP (myself included) fits in a 2% of the population bracket in a question of this nature. Yes, 2% of a multi-hundred million population still yields a high number of people, but I think it's a bit pretentious of us to actually take these 'results' at face value.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not hating on FYP at all, it's just that I don't think our 'uniqueness' (which we no doubt all have) would manifest itself in this same manner. Are we to assume that 98% of people can't think of a more creative tool than a hammer? And as for color, I went with my favorite color, green, I think that's a pretty obvious, not very unique choice. Either way, let me get to Norman's proposal (since he so kindly called me out so that I may take a 10 minute break from spamming everyone on facebook about popsense)

His question, just as a reminder, was- "if "everyone" is special, is it not possible to think that no one really is?"

This is, as I'm sure most of you realize, a point of value not just in the context of the red hammer experiment.
Lately I've found myself emerged in the 'hipster' scene in my attempts at being more 'culturally aware'. Inevitably, a common conclusion that can be easily drawn is that, today, a vast majority of our society has taken on the 'counter-conformist' lifestyle that usually yields a conformist result. Last night while surfing YouTube I landed upon a video of some 13 year old kid convinced that he was making the boldest of statements by disregarding the importance of 'conforming to society' so that he may avoid the 'loss of identity'

It is inherent in acting upon this fear of conforming that one in fact loses the identity they wish to maintain. In a deconstructive sense, one is merely supporting the legitimacy of the system by presenting a need to rebel from it. There is, I wager, still a means of existence where we can be 'unique' and 'individual' without trying to be either of those things, but by simply being them.

I turn to one of my favorite theories of all time- advanced theory (feel free to read Chuck Klosterman's article on it here.

Advanced Theory posits that when an artist puts out a song that is deemed 'bad' by 99% of the population, it may not be because the music sucks, but rather because 99% of the population IS NOT ADVANCED enough to understand it. Klosterman pokes fun at this theory, in the same way this theory pokes fun at all forms of high culture that assume a lack of 'understanding' in the place of a lack of appreciation.

The reason I bring up this theory is because it places understanding, creativity, and uniqueness on a linear plane. This is not the case. One cannot fall into a 2% or a 98% of uniqueness, no arbitrary question about colors and tools can offer some numeric result that should determine our individuality.

It's not surprising, Norman, that you wanted to be in that 98%. I bet a lot of us felt that way after seeing everyone's answers. But why do you want to be in that 98%, so you may be different, right? So the numbers, then, mean nothing, it's just this idea of being 'different' than a select group of people.

"If everyone is special, is it not possible that no one really is?"
No Norman, that isn't possible. Whether or not we have a predictable response to a random question does not have any effect on our individuality. To think that it does, or rather, to let it, is the only way that it ever could.

Sincerely,
Jeff

Agree? Or am I full of shit? Leave a comment, let me know!
MORE»

Lisa Kudrow, after a career of inventing post-it notes, writing fantastic folk ditties such as "Smelly Cat", and being married to a psychiatrist involved with mob, has turned her (actually quite brilliant) talents in a new direction, starring in upcoming low budget indie flick "Kabluey" alongside writer and director Scott Prendergast. We're introduced to a worn woman, Leslie, whose husband's deployment to Iraq has left her life in a complete upheaval, having to deal with the onset of loneliness and the savage beast-ary of her two young sons. Uncertain hope comes in the form of Leslie's husband's brother and black sheep, Salman, dressed in a corporate mascot's clothing. With the fate of the family in his hands, will Salman be able to keep it together long enough to salvage the ruins that cannot rebuild without his aid? Or will he fall back into his mysteriously shady past, letting down the last people to believe in him?

While movies about familial dishevelment are nothing new, and we all can pretty much guess how it's going to end, there's seems to be something refreshing about Prendergast's story of hitting absolute bottom. If you can ignore whatever political slant the film almost inevitably is going to take, and see through to the heart of the story, I'm sure, along with the apparently witty dialogue, beautifully sprawling scenery, and fascinating use of color, "Kabluey" will not be one to disappoint.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Like Neo learned in the Matrix, there is no link- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito, and Ali Starzyk.

gamine \gam-EEN; GAM-een\, noun:
1. A playfully mischievous girl or young woman.

- After the infamous breakup with Sonny, it was finally revealed to the world that beneath the minx of a gamine known as Cher was the heart and penis of a grown man. (Note: This definitely was not the reason Sonny broke up with Cher.)

- While Katy Perry's image may be built around her appearance as a gamine vixen, instead of kissing girls and liking it all day, she secretly would prefer spending her time sitting in a rocking chair knitting sweaters adorned with pictures of cats.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, this isn't fair! Can't we switch roles every once in a while!
No Becky!! You're the king of the jungle and I'm the leaf-covered gamine, end of story. Don't make me release my cobra on you! RAWR!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Due to the length of the post, please ignore this link- MORE»

“He behaved in a gratuitous, cowardly and disgraceful way."

- Judge David Radford telling Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, why he will be serving 27 months in jail for beating up pub manager James King in a barroom fight in 2006 and offering him $400,000 to keep quiet.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are the other two coked-up unicorns testifying as to why you led Charlie to 'Candy Mountain'.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Meg Ryan recalling Russell Crowe's decision to throw a phone at another human being, and you realize that what you're saying also conveniently describes the first sexual encounter you had with him.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are George Bush publicly describing any terrorist or any member of the cabinet who forgets to wear their 32 pieces of flair to the weekly staff meeting. ESPECIALLY if your name starts with a Con and ends in a dileeza... yeah that's right, you know I'm talking to you little missy, don't think I can't count to 32, I've had enough of this whole black-power bullshit, why don't you just come out and admit that you think Barack is cute, you're not fooling anyone.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Conor Oberst - Lenders in the Temple.mp3(Removed per request of label)
MGMT - Time To Pretend.mp3
Ra Ra Riot - Ghost Under Rocks.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

photo art by jeff

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

Remember a time when tag referred to that children’s game, the words “friend” and “message” weren’t used as verbs, the phrase “wall post” made absolutely no sense, and poking a person was not just a click away? Yeah, that wasn’t as long ago as it might feel.

Facebook.com has grown vastly in its four-year lifespan. When Mark Zuckerberg created the site in his sophomore year at Harvard in 2004, its only members were his fellow students in the Ivy League school, but now it has expanded all around the world, available to anyone over 13 with an email address. Facebook even has its own company headquarters in Palo Alto, California!

Facebook has been an appealing way for young people all over the world to interact with each other in all sorts of new ways. Site users have the opportunity to show their own personal photos and videos to all their friends in an easy manner, join and create groups for specific interests, cause, and inside jokes, advertise upcoming events, and above all, communicate with their friends online in perhaps one of the easiest ways possible. No longer do we have to save email addresses and AIM screen names to keep in contact with people we don’t see on a regular basis. On Facebook, all we have to do is enter a friend’s name into a search bar and add him or her to our friend list, now known as “friending” (spell check didn’t like that one), and we can say something to them via message, wall post, or Facebook chat. And ever since the arrival of the multitude of new Facebook applications, site users can do all sorts of crazy things with their profile, whether it be making or taking a quiz a quiz, sending a friend a fake drink, or encouraging others to take a side in the ongoing battle of Pirates vs. Ninjas.

With photography being a hobby of mine, I’ve personally enjoyed the relaxing ease of being able to share all sorts of pictures with my friends, yet my favorite ability that Facebook gives me is the one for which it was primarily made. Being able to communicate quickly and easily with my friends in faraway places have been revolutionary. While sitting in the college dorm room, I felt no distance from my high school friends, despite the fact that they were actually in different states. Even my dad got a Facebook account when he was deployed to Kosovo during my senior year of high school as a way to keep in touch with my brother and me.

With Facebook being such a popular way for people to communicate electronically, I can only help but ponder the site’s future. Will it be just another fad of a decade like disco music or Beanie Babies? Or will it instead bear a presence in the years to come like the cell phone, which has been continually modified year after year to fit more comfortably into our lifestyles?

It’s possible in that in the years to come, we may look at Facebook as one of those crazy things we did as kids. After all, it wouldn’t be the first time that something that was once so popular became either a thing of the past or a rare novelty in the present. When was the last time you caught a flick at the drive-in movie theater or played with a yo-yo? Facebook could be replaced by something more appealing to society or people could just lose interest, or worse, something could happen to it that would shut it down for good.

However, I hope and expect that Facebook is here to stay and will evolve in ways to meet our needs even more. We continue to adapt our technology in ways never before thought possible that make our lives more convenient both personally and professionally. Take a look at the Internet for example. Once upon a time, it was a place with few website and the only way to connect to it was to hook the phone line into the computer, leaving you with a slow connection and temporarily disabled telephone. Now, we can access the Internet at incredible speeds from our laptops wherever a wireless hotspot is available to view multitudes of sites. Companies can create sites to sell their goods online as well as in the store, and average people like you and me can build their own sites to express themselves in whatever fashion they choose.

And it seems that Facebook is already preparing itself for the future. For example, the iPhone has a Facebook application separate from the Internet; you can go straight to Facebook as you would for AOL Instant Messenger. And maybe Facebook will find its way into the working world. After all, twenty years ago people didn’t use email to communicate with colleagues and clients, but in the present day, it’s almost impossible to not use email in some work situations. Perhaps Facebook could fill some unforeseen practical need in our professional lives.

Now, I’m interested to read what you think on the subject. Feel free to post comments on how you think Facebook will affect society. Is it just a fad or will it be used in the future? If used in the future, in what ways? MORE»

Special Guest Post by Bobby and Tyler

5 things you shouldn't do when getting pulled over with Samuel L. Jackson in your car...

- Look at him and say bitch be cool!!
- Tell the cop you're with the star from 'Snakes on a Plane'
- Say that the creepy black guy with the purple lightsaber told you to do it
- Call him a backseat driver and tell him the rules of engagement aren't the same as the rules of the road
- Ask him to go frozone on the officer so you guys can dip out of there!!!

Failure to avoid these actions will result in hearing Ezekiel 25:17 and a bullet from John Travolta
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Due to the length of the post, please ignore this link- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


How much money will The Dark Knight make opening weekend?
a. 50-100 million - 2%
b. 100-150 million - 5%
c. 150-200 million - 44%
d. 200+ million - 47%

With neither extended weekend nor holiday, Ledger, Bale and company officially made Tobey Maguire feel like the scrawny little boy that he is. Though PopSense readers were collectively off, one can't really be disappointed in the poll results. A close second place was spot-on, and the winners were just eager little fans of a childhood hero who has become so much more in these latest installments. Straight up, you know you're the shit when you release your film in IMAX (Note: The first fully-animated film to be released in IMAX was "The Old Man and the Sea"... bitch please, Hemmingway = major badass). Of course, when the time comes, the next question will be of potential posthumous Oscar for Heath Ledger. If nothing else, I'm pleased that the word "posthumous" is being rejuvenated as a household term. Anyway, I'll be honest, I still actually need to go see Dark Knight (I know, I know... I know), but I've obviously heard great things and I'm happy to see that our readers anticipated the best for the film. (For actual reference, it ended up raking in a record-high $155.3 (Update: $158.4) million this weekend, so we weren't right, but nobody's complaining.)

New Poll: It's a bird...
Who would play Superman if it were redone today?
a. Ben Affleck
b. Jake Gyllenhaal
c. Sean Penn
d. Tom Cruise

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

Some Midday Monday Tunes:
Ra Ra Riot - Each Year.mp3
Feist - Mushaboom.mp3
Radiohead - Killer Cars.mp3
Pelle Carlberg - Go to Hell, Miss Rydell.mp3
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Due to the length of this post, please ignore the following link- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

supernumerary \soo-puhr-NOO-muh-rair-ee; -NYOO-\, adjective:
1. Exceeding what is necessary or desired; superfluous.

- Some people who don't care about the Earth's creatures (alive or extinct) would foolishly deem supernumerary the creation of installments 2-12 of "The Land Before Time" series.

- Known for his supernumarary acts of discipline (mostly involving makeshift war clubs fashioned with tattered rolling pins), the Keebler Elf is one nasty son of a bitch.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Oh God Derrick, you must be kidding?! I can understand the first time maybe, but the other 20 times were definitely supernumerary!
This is why you should stay in the kitchen and keep your mouth shut, Becky! Remember what Jesus once said-- Hit a small woodland creature who seems vaguely threatening once, protect your family for a day, hit a small woodland creature 21 times with a baseball bat after you've already established that it poses no danger, protect your family for life. Pretty smart dude for a guy who walked around aimlessly with his groupies all day.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

As the internet gods had intended, PopSense will be taking Sundays off, for the most part. We will, however, give you our top 10 posts from the week and a happenin' little music mix just cause we can't even think about actually going a day without posting anything.




Hot Posts 7/13-7/20
- The PopSense Seven Deadly Sins
- An Ode to Britney Spears
- Life In The House Lights
- PopSense Update 7/18
- The Hamburger: A Salute to American Culture
- Warning All Lactose Intolerant Homophobes!!
- M.I.A. no more?
- SnagFilms: Not Your Grandma's Documentaries
- Still Slim: Cultural Conclusions 7/14
- Abstinence and the Kiddies: Quote of the Day 7/15

Pseudo Silent Sundays Mix
1. Ra Ra Riot - Dying Is Fine.mp3
2. Shock of Pleasure - Superstar.mp3
3. Anoraak - Talking In Your Sleep.mp3
4. Pelle Carlberg - Clever Girls Like Clever Boys Much More Than Clever Boys Like Clever Girls.mp3
5. Ladyhawke - Paris Is Burning (Alex Gopher remix).mp3
6. The Hold Steady - Your Little Hoodrat Friend.mp3
7. Conor Oberst - Souled Out!!!.mp3(Removed per request of label)
8. Beck - Gamma Ray.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Meriam Raouf

M.I.A. A filmmaker. A fashionista. A political activist. A visual artist. And recently more true to her name than ever—missing. Until Now.

Since the cancellation of her European tour dates in June and July and her sudden announcement of early retirement, everyone is wondering what M.I.A. is up to. There are all kinds of rumors flying around. Just some of the many hypotheses for this unforeseen departure include: visa problems, supporting her mother, preparing her upcoming fashion line or new album, engagement to Benjamin Brewer, or good ol’ fashioned hipster “quit while you’re awesome” mentality....

As mysterious as possible, M.I.A.’s brief announcement:
"This is my last show, and I'm glad I'm spending it with all my hippies,"
Mind you, she never specifically stated that it was the end of her making music. Very tricky.

So what does this mean for all of us who have become so hypnotized by her nearly seizure-inducing visual art and similarly flashy subliminal music? Fear not, hipsters. There is hope after all. Seeing as M.I.A made her debut originally through file sharing on the internet, and even willingly distributed tracks for free, it is only fitting that her mysterious reappearance be made available through that same medium. I know what you’re thinking cats: that isn’t mysterious enough for her.
Her obscure reappearance can be found on myspace.com/radioclit in a recently posted song called “Get it Up” featuring Santogold. In the last five minutes, it jumped over thirty plays. Go myspacers.

If you're still feeling a bit lost, here's the general story; Mathangi Arulpragasam, also known as M.I.A. has been bringing us pleasantly addicting experimental beats since the heavy file-sharing of her singles “Galang” and “Sunshowers.” Before that, she was an accomplished visual artist, with celebrities like Jude Law looking to buy her artwork. Her public exhibition in 2001 featured politically-driven works of neon spray paint depicting pictures of the Tamil rebellion movement. On the back cover of a book of the collection reads:
"From a long-forgotten region of endemic conflict comes a project to challenge your ethical core. The art of warfare is sprawled across these pages transforming bloodshed into beauty and raising the phoenix of forbidden expression - The real war is in us."

Instead of “waiting on the world to change,” M.I.A.’s music is heavy in political meaning, with fun beats to boot. When discussing this, M.I.A. stated, "Nobody wants to be dancing to political songs. Every bit of music out there that’s making it into the mainstream is really about nothing. I wanted to see if I could write songs about something important and make it sound like nothing. And it kind of worked."

Note: M.I.A isn’t done creating a buzz. A simple click to her website introduces a short film called Real Pirates of the Caribbean and promise of an online webstore.

Santogold - Get It Up (Radioclit Mix_feat._M.I.A._and_Gorilla_Zoe).mp3

M.I.A. - Paper Planes.mp3
M.I.A. - Jimmy.mp3
M.I.A. - Boyz.mp3
Santogold - L.E.S Artistes.mp3
Santogold - Say Aha.mp3
MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

malinger \muh-LING-guhr\, intransitive verb:
1. To feign or exaggerate illness or inability in order to avoid duty or work.

- Adam Sandler has learned to malinger as some character with mental disability for the last 15 years, allowing him to avoid any and all real acting... and we are thankful for it.

- The master of malingering, Matt Damon, magically manipulates his manhood to avoid any and all sexual contact with his wife.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick! All you had to do was malinger at work yesterday so you could call in sick today to go to Little Jimmy's recital!
You know I'm a man of high morals Becky! If I tell my boss I'm gonna be paralyzed from the neck down, then my God I better damn well be paralyzed from the neck down... Besides, I always wanted to jump off of a Ferris Wheel and land in a small container of chocolate pudding.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I think I'd draw the line at porn, but no one has asked"

- Comedian Ben Stiller responding to Playboy's inquiry on how far he'd go in humiliating himself.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are the feisty harlot Princess Peach and you're being a total tease to Mario and Luigi. You've given up on Yoshi... that asexual freak.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Tobey Maguire's pale, boyish, white body, and you are shocked that you haven't had a chance to turn down Penthouse yet.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are an involuntary participant on Bob Barker's latest game show that he has been running in his basement since he got booted from The Price Is Right, and Bob hands you a pencil and a piece of paper with 4 terms- molestation, animal abuse, porn, and ice cream, and he asks you absolutely nothing.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Conor Oberst - Danny Callahan.mp3
The Hold Steady - Chips Ahoy!.mp3
Pelle Carlberg - I Love You, You Imbecile.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Top 5 Ways To Become Christian Bale

5. Star as the adorable rapscallion-of-a-lead nicknamed "Cowboy" in a Disney musical film, and make it look way classier than it should.

4. Be willing at any moment to commit mass murder if someone thinks they have a better business card than you. 

3. Comfortably lend your voice to a completely uncharacteristic role as the lovable screw-up in a cartoon film that sympathizes with the native folk.

2. Manage to tame Russell Crowe long enough to successfully film 3:10 to Yuma.

1. Be jacked, go on a crash diet of predominantly coffee and apples to lose 60 pounds for your role as an insomniac, and then become jacked again only to be told by your director that you are in fact too jacked for your role as a fictional super hero whose muscles are meant to bulge through his titanium costume.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here-

Before There Was Norris and Bauer...
Clint Eastwood - 35%
Robert De Niro - 14%
Sean Connery - 21%
Al Pacino - 28%

Despite the unbelievably vague nature of this question, I still manage to be surprised by the results. The popularity of Clint Eastwood among our viewers comes as a pleasant shock to me to be totally honest. The only conclusion I can draw on that front is the recent release of the Dirty Harry series on DVD (with sweet DVD cover sleeve) or the fact that he's the only actor on this list who is still visibly active in the biz. It probably came down to a battle of catch phrases with "Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk?" going head to head with "Say hello to my little friend!" and (sadly in last place) "You talkin' to me?". In the actual spirit of the 'question' itself, I would've put my money on Connery just because of the SNL factor and the potential for Bauer/Norris-esque jokes. Either way, all these guys deserve props for being total badasses.

New Poll: The Opening Knight
How much money will Dark Knight make this weekend?
a. 50-100 million
b. 100-150 million
c. 150-200 million
d. 200+ million

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

tatterdemalion \tat-uhr-dih-MAYL-yuhn\, adjective:
1. A person dressed in tattered or ragged clothing; a ragamuffin.

- You skanky little tatterdemalion you! Don't you ever go near little Billy again, Pippi Longstocking!

- "Can you believe that Kurt Cobain actually spent a period of his life in homelessness as an average tatterdemalion?" inquired the young student of grunge. "Yes" replied everyone.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
No Derrick, it doesn't work like that.
What? If we tell the kids that 'tatterdemalion' is a popular costume these days, like 'ghost' or 'pirate', and say that the government decided to make Halloween all year round, then we really can get everything we need from Walmart.

Some early afternoon tunes:
Feist - 1234.mp3
Pas/Cal - You Were Too Old For Me.mp3
Santogold - L.E.S. Artistes.mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Hello readers!

We'd like to do this a lot more often, but for now I'll skip the apologies and pretend that we do it all the time. Just wanted to give everybody a quick update on some things coming your way in the next few weeks.

Tomorrow the PopSense team will be sitting down with David Burstein, a 19-year-old student who spent the last 2 years touring the country, interviewing tons of Senators, Congressmen, regular people without cool titles, etc, and has put together not only a documentary but an entire movement entitled 18 in '08 that is encouraging political activity for young adults aged 18-24 (29 million eligible voters) in the upcoming election. Don't worry, PopSense doesn't throw softballs, we make Chris Matthews look like Katie Couric... yeah, I said it.


As you might have already seen, we had a great interview with The Postelles' lead singer Daniel Balk, and after tomorrow's, we've got more band interviews coming up as well as a special chat with New York club legend Don Hill and another with Andrew Foster Altschul, creative writing professor at Stanford, former music journalist and rock DJ, and now author of the new novel Lady Lazarus.



On top of the interviews, we're really pumped to keep coming with more guest posts. As you've probably noticed, we've been running a bunch lately, and that's because it's all part of our evil plan to make the website more about you! Sure we have an overwhelming self-confidence that allows us to convince ourselves that we're ceaselessly hilarious and entertaining, but in moments of calmer thought, we realize that there are so many potential contributors that will better site just waiting for the chance. Now is the time to open those channels. Feel free to contact us if you want to be a part of this movement, and we'll talk terms from there. General concept-- you write/film/record/telegraphically transmit about anything you love, and we provide you with a large audience that will most likely love it too.

For now that's pretty much it, we'll keep coming with all your favorite daily features, more new videos, and coming soon, The PopSense Street Team...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Still stuck with this link even when our articles stay on one page- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

I come bearing word of a great new website that the fantabulous Debra Cohen has brought to my attention.

Debra sent this my way earlier today, SnagFilms.com, it's a brand new database of both popular and obscure documentaries available for free to watch and share. Don't worry, these aren't the documentaries that you were forced to watch when you had a substitute teacher in your Modern Euro class and the two things that troubled you were, 1-How does someone actually become an 'historian'? and 2- I had no idea I could sleep with my eyes open?! But seriously, this is an awesome site that I've just started to explore. You'll see right off the bat that they have some really well-known works-- Super Size Me, State of the Union, Heavy Metal in Baghdad, etc, but it's definitely worth looking deeper into as well, informing yourself and keeping yourself entertained (hmm, sorta like PopSense...maybe) Enjoy and thanks again Debra!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Arian Murati
Check out Arian's current band Pushing Mongo and download their latest EP Nature vs. Nurture. Or read more posts by Arian.

Greetings internets. I'll take this chance to introduce myself. I'm Arian. I play drums in a band called Pushing Mongo. In other words, I'm unemployed, have a very unstable income, and will never hold a steady relationship. I'm here to dish out life lessons through various stories about my experiences in the world of underground music. If anything, these stories should serve as warnings to any aspiring musician.

I'll start things off with some advice on playing your first show. I played my first show in 2002 in Ridgewood, NJ. At the time, I was a guitarist. I had dyed my hair bright red (I apparently thought I was in Green Day), and the band I was then a part of (The Buzz) had to follow some ska band that everyone was there to see. We had 20 minutes to prove ourselves, and we completely blew it.

I broke my high E string during the first song, our drummer suddenly came to the conclusion that he didn't know how to play our own songs, and we made the worst cover choice ever - "Molly's Lips". Yes, the Nirvana version. A cover of a cover. Smooth. If it hadn't been for the fact that the headlining band's singer came onstage and sang dual vocals for it (he clearly took pity upon us), we probably would have been booed offstage. After that debacle, our bassist thought it was more important to get girls' phone numbers than pack up his equipment, so I left all his stuff onstage and we left without him. The band broke up a week after that show.

There are two things that one must always remember when taking the stage for the first time, and those are 1, you suck, and 2, everyone hates you. Chances are, if this is your first show, your band will be playing your set long before the headliners even get out of bed to go to the show. You're playing to the other local acts and their girlfriends. You probably had to sell 20 tickets just to get on the bill, and none of your friends have even shown up yet. There's a good chance that they won't even show up, and just bought tickets from you so you would just leave them alone. Get used to this situation, as you'll be in it forever unless your band gets it together and starts rocking properly.

Next week I'll fast forward a few years and talk about playing with Hardcore bands that make ameteur porn ( it actually gets quite interesting), and surviving VFW Hall shows.

Some evening tunes:
Liam Finn - Second Chance.mp3
Silversun Pickups - Little Lover's So Polite.mp3
The Wallflowers - From the Bottom of My Heart.mp3
MORE»

MORE»

MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


Britney I knew you would stick
From your days in the Mickey Mouse Club
But maybe it's cause you're a hick
That you married that 'K-Fed' scrub

Why did you leave JT?
Were you looking for something blander?
You know that you drove us crazy
When you married Jason Alexander

With a new album on the way
We hope that you choose better men
Cause I never wanna hear you say
Oops I did it again!

You've had your issues it's true
From booze to marijuana
But we'll still be Slaves 4 U
As long as you're kissing Madonna

With your ever-Toxic shout
Money will flow in boat loads
Just don't put another movie out
Cause nothing could top Crossroads

Your journey back to the top
Will surely be a tough climb
But you know that we'll never stop
Screamin' "Baby One More Time"

Want to read past odes, click here

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Please ignore this link- MORE»

- Stelios Phili EDITOR



Who could have predicted that Zooey Deschanel (of Elf and indie fame) would be killed at least twenty-five times in the span of of two minutes and thirty seconds? While this music video is quite overt (animated gore to accompany a cutesy love song), it is nonetheless entertaining - pacman ghosts, cowboys, black ghosts playing banjos, and vultures are all somehow incorporated. Oh yeah, and Zooey Deschanel throws an ax and kills four of her clones! Roar!

To learn more about the "Him" in She & Him, click here.

She & Him - Why Do You Let Me Stay Here.mp3
She & Him - You Really Got a Hold On Me.mp3
She & Him - Sentimental Heart.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

anodyne \AN-uh-dyn\, adjective:
1. Serving to relieve pain; soothing.

- I know of no tones more anodyne than those of Blue Oyster Cult's "Don't Fear The Reaper" when it comes to curing an uncanny fever of which the only prescription is more cowbell.

- The Nintendo Wii is truly an anodyne sight for the sore hearts of gamers everywhere who now have something to entertain chicks with instead of making them watch you play World of Warcraft.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, this has GOT to be the most anodyne thing you've ever done for me, how did you ever pull it all off?
Well Becky, it's funny you ask. Remember those delicious chocolates i gave you earlier, well I bought those at the store. And that massage I gave you after that? Well, I had been training under the world's finest masseuse secretly for the last 3 months. Oh and now this hot tub you're sitting in? Well, when I say I got those chocolates at the store, I really mean I molded them out of Sparky's shit, and when I say I've been training under the world's finest masseuse secretly for the last 3 months, I actually mean that I've been cheating on you with the neighbor's wife for the last 3 months... in this hot tub.

A morning tune:
Pelle Carlberg - 1983 (Pelle & Sebastian).mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I'm trying to reinvent her and reinvent myself with the project"

- Producer Rodney Jerkins discussing his plans on working with Britney Spears this summer on her newest album.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are R. Kelly planning a new offbeat musical starring Elizabeth Berkley (Jesse Spano from Saved by the Bell) in hopes of reviving her career after Showgirls... you will soon call off your plans when you realize that there already exists a popular musical entitled "Urinetown".

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are producer Rodney Jerkins... and it's funny because your parents must hate you since you have the words "Rod" and "Jerkin" in your name.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are God having a futuristic mantalk with Adam about your plans circa 2008 to update Eve and company by installing a universal device in their belly buttons so you never lose the remote. This improvement will (obviously) be instituted after your inauguration of the third breast for every woman.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Setting Sun - How Long.mp3
Feist - I Feel It All.mp3
Santogold - Creator.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili EDITOR

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


Which Celebrity Do You Respect Most?
Cate Blanchett - 7%
Morgan Freeman - 63%
Natalie Portman - 18%
Christian Bale - 10%

The PopSense editors would like to apologize for ever even posing this question. We now see the error of our blasphemous ways to consider any Earthly competition worthy against Morgan Freeman aka the voice of God. We appreciate that a few of you were so bold as to show your love for Natalie Portman, for I am sure that even Morgan Freeman can acknowledge that she is one of very few women in existence who can be that smart and look that good with a shaved head. Just as a note of warning, our cult love for Christian Bale is going to be in full drive straight through the release of Dark Knight. As for Cate Blanchett... I just thought, well, I mean when it comes to actresses today, I, I just wanted balance and, she was, well I mean she was the Queen but, just... nevermind.

New Poll: You Talkin' To Me?
Before there was Norris and Bauer...

a. Clint Eastwood
b. Robert De Niro
c. Sean Connery
d. Al Pacino

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

-------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

mephitic \muh-FIT-ik\, adjective:
1. Offensive to the smell

- The mephitic aromas emanating from the state of New Jersey confirm its nickname as the 'armpit' of America and help to draw together some loose ends when analyzing the story of Bette Midler's conception.

- Roseanne + Colonel Sanders + bucket of sushi flavored lubricant = Mephitic.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Oh my good Lord, Derrick! What is that mephitic odor coming from the kitchen??
Well, ya see, Becky, I just felt that if you wanted to give everything a more 'rustic' 1930's look, I thought 'why not make this all a bit more authentic by setting up a wooden rocking chair and placing my late grandmother's remains on it'. Look-- she's smiling!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I'd love to do a younger, cleaner version of Sex and the City."

- Miley Cyrus (aka Hannah Montana) discussing what projects she'd like to work on in the future.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are the famous spokesman for a Proctor and Gamble household product, and you are sick of the way those girls scurry around, especially at their age, without washing their hands after every meal. No one makes a mockery of Mr. Clean, bitch!

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are the soft core child porn king of New York, Tobey Maguire.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Kimbo Slice discussing your post-streetfighting acting plans. Realistically you see yourself as either Samantha because of your mature, feisty side, or Carrie because of your affinity for horses.

Want more of Miley? Check out the PopSense Ode to Miley Cyrus.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Lackthereof - Choir Practice.mp3
RATATAT - Mahalo.mp3
Santogold - Starstruck (Diplo Remix).mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Special Guest Post by Antigone Phili

Though this unique class of people might be pissed, I come bearing some damn good news for the rest of us. At last, our two greatest affections, Elton John and Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, have combined forces to create our biggest fantasy yet. This fantasy is about as real as the Jonas Brothers' purity. This juicy new Elton John flavor has been titled “Goodbye Yellow Brickle Road,” and the proceeds will be donated to charity (the Elton John AIDS Foundation)! So now you’ve got Elton John and Ben & Jerry’s, all in one—while at the same time, you’re being a good person. You know you want it. Follow your dreams—it’s calling you.

Elton John - Rocket Man.mp3
Elton John - Tiny Dancer.mp3
Elton John - Your Song.mp3


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here-

Its here! As we reported a few days ago, Radiohead has recorded a live music video without cameras. In the words of Thom Yorke, “I always like the idea of using technology in a way that it wasn’t meant to be used, the struggle to get your head round what you can do with it. I liked the idea of making a video of human beings and real life and time without using any cameras, just lasers, so there are just mathematical points — and how strangely emotional it ended up being." I'd like to thank the many laser beams that came together, set aside their differences, and brought Radiohead to a new level of awesomeness. Enjoy.

Radiohead - House of Cards.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

fiduciary \fih-DOO-shee-air-ee\, adjective:
1. Relating to the holding of something in trust for another.

Jeff- Arnold, as the sole fiduciary of Iggy's secret, was actually forced to wear bunny footsy pajamas himself and take a walk of shame after Sid and Stinky guessed the truth.

Ali- Peter "Wormtail" Pettigrew, disgracing rat-enthusiasts everywhere, put the 'douche' in fiduciary when he totally screwed over James and Lilly Potter.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Holy shit Derrick, I cannot believe you made Bill the fiduciary of our entire savings account.
I'm telling you Becky, the man knows what he's doing... have you ever seen anyone recite the pledge of allegiance with 40 marshmallows in their mouth before??

Anoraak is the fiduciary of my French Electro Pop-Lovin' Heart
Anoraak - Talking in your sleep.mp3
Anoraak - The Wizzard.mp3
Anoraak - Nightdrive With You.mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stel, Jeff, and Ali

“It hurts me deeply that someone that I have loved and respected for so many years would discuss overtly negative personal opinions about my marriage in a public forum"

- Christopher Knight aka Peter Brady, outraged by the remarks of Florence Henderson (Momma Brady), about his recent marriage to reality-TV costar Adrianne Curry

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Tom Cruise pissed at your ex-wife Nicole Kidman for openly calling you a cheating glib bastard and publicly embarrassing you and your new slutty wife, Scientology.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Michael Moore making a new documentary solely for the purpose of expressing your anger at Ronald McDonald for mocking your latest marriage to the Burger King

The winning time to use this quote:
When, after being denied to wed for the second time, you rollover in bed and look your sweet, sweet Kayne West in the eyes. George Bush really does hate black people

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
WHY? - The Hollows.mp3
She & Him - Why Do You Let Me Stay Here.mp3
Dragonette - Sharp Dressed Man (ZZ Top cover).mp3
(This song is part of the 80's cover project "Rewind".)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

You might have perhaps scoffed at my title, thinking that it ought to be renamed “The Hamburger: A Salute to American Obesity”. Once upon a time, I might have agreed with you. However, after watching a special on the Travel Channel about the burger, I began to realize how this sandwich has made a statement about our country’s culture. Not just one about millions of lazy Americans who need to go on a diet to stop themselves from getting heart attacks, but one that embodies and solidifies the American ideals such as capitalism and the melting pot. Perhaps you think I’m crazy, but hear me out.

The USA may not be experiencing the waves of immigration it did when the term “melting pot” was coined, but America is still home to various groups of diverse people. After all, the term American can be applied to the rich red-carpet-walking celebrity or the hard-working blue-collar laborer. Those who walk the city streets with sky-scrapers constantly in their view hail from the same nation as those who wake up to see acres of farmland outside their bedroom windows. Even at this present day and age, America is a land of people teeming with all sort of different lifestyles, interests, and tastes. Yet they can still all call the same land home.

Which is why capitalism can be implemented oh-so-successfully in the country. Businesses and entrepreneurs have the opportunity to be creative in how they sell their goods and services, creating different variations of the same product to gain more market success. People in one area might like Model A of a product better than Model B, but Model B can then go on to be marketed in another area and prove to by more successful there than Model A.

And that’s where the hamburger comes in. Take a product known all over the country and modify enough to really appeal to a specific area of the melting pot and see what happens. According to what I saw on the Travel Channel, that’s exactly what some entrepreneurs have done with the burger.

Sure, some of them just change little things about how they cook it, such as Ted’s Restaurant in Meridian, Connecticut that steams their burgers instead of grilling them (apparently steaming cooks it more evenly), but others completely change the ball game with the American delicacy. In Kennett Square, Pennsylvania, the Half-Moon Restaurant will serve you up a burger made from the meat of kangaroo, alligator, wild boar, buffalo, or any other sort of wild game. These meats tend to be much leaner than beef, which leads to healthier, yet still tasty, hamburgers. Down in Hermosa Beach, California, the Spot has made its mark on the community with its incredible veggie burgers. Even the meat-eaters will come in for this mixture of fresh vegetables, beans, rice, and soy packed into a hamburger patty. Doesn’t sound the most appetizing to me, but the owners must be doing something right if carnivores keeping asking what meat they’re using because the burgers are just that good.

New York City has a couple of notable burger joints of its own to appeal to different crowds of people. Fan of the late night bar scene? Head into Pop Burger, where you can get 3-inch burgers in between your drinks. And you might even see Justin Timberlake or Jay-Z while you’re there; they’re both frequent customers. And if you really want to fell like a high-rolling red-meat eater, it doesn’t get much better than the Old Homestead Steakhouse. Each burger contains 20 ounces of Kobe beef, perhaps the best hamburger meat in the world, and it’ll cost you a pretty penny of $41 apiece, but I hear it’s worth it.

Now maybe if you think really hard, you can come up with a burger joint in your own area that does something unique and different to appeal to the certain fraction of the melting pot that lives nearby. I thought of two in my own college town of Charlottesville, Virginia. I could walk just down the street to White Spot (where Dave Matthews once worked years ago) and get myself their famous Gus Burger, a hamburger topped off with a delicious fried egg. Or perhaps stroll over to the Wild Wing Café and get a burger soaked in the marinade of any of the 33 flavors of Buffalo wings. Despite how weird it may sound, it’s actually quite good.

Now maybe after all this, you might think I’m reading a little bit too much into the variety of burger restaurants there are. But I’d like to think that the burger could be a symbol of the values for which American stands. It’s not too hard for everyone in Italy to like the pasta, because the little boot is smaller than some of our individual states and therefore not a home to so many different types of people. Yet, the burger can be loved by all in a nation as big as America thanks to the ingenuity of countless entrepreneurs of the past and present. In a way, it unites us. We have the opportunity to eat our burgers as we choose, just as we can live our lives in this country as we choose. We don’t all have to be the same, but we are all still one nation.

So I salute the hamburger as a testament to the America, the land of unity and the land of opportunities.
MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Which of these rappers would you compare yourself to?
Snoop Dogg - 18%
Eminem - 39%
Dr. Dre - 12%
Kanye West - 30%

PopSense doesn't like black people. Kanye West would most likely draw this conclusion after a heartbreaking loss to the white chocolate of rap, Marshall Mathers aka Eminem. This poll confirmed long-standing suspicions that the PopSense readership lacks ethnic diversity, but also serves as a helpful barometer of the varying character types that our viewers embody. With Dre at the bottom of the list, there isn't a lot of personally-acknowledged street cred perusing the pages of popsense. Snoop Dogg, the lovable party pothead, put up a respectable third-place showing, but come on, you can't actually think you're as cool as Snoop Dogg. Kanye at a close second flaunts the egotistical, hard working, and in yo' face style, but Eminem proved the most compatible with our readers by demonstrating an early air of fringe rambunctiousness which has now been cooled off into a seasoned self-confidence. Also, PopSense viewers may or may not have beef with their mommas.

New Poll: Finally We're Not Being Assholes

Which Celebrity Do You Respect Most?
a. Cate Blanchett
b. Morgan Freeman
c. Natalie Portman
d. Christian Bale

cupidity \kyoo-PID-uh-tee\, noun:
1. Eager or excessive desire, especially for wealth; greed; avarice.

Jeff- Richard Hatch mirrored his affinity for recreational nudity with a cupidity that led him to actually believe he could avoid filing his taxes after winning one million dollars in the season finale of 'Survivor' in front of an audience of 52 million viewers.

Stel- With the cupidity of a common street squirrel, Donald Trump hoards packs of children to build hotels and and hit television shows, only to individually fire them all shortly thereafter.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, you said you'd calm down after we had kids!
Becky... no smelly offspring of yours will cease my cupidity for milk and cookies. Oh, and PopSense readers-- I'm not talking about grandma's milk and cookies... if you know what I mean.

Some rockin' sounds for Monday morning:
Golden Animals - Try On Me.mp3
The Melvins - Nude With Boots
The Walkmen - In the New Year.mp3
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

No, it can't be. Not already? But wait, hold on, I definitely woke up and it was Friday like 20 minutes ago. Yeah, yeah, absolutely, cause remember you said, "this weekend is gonna be awesome" and then I was all, "I know dude, I can't wait to hit up the Museum of Modern Art and make jokes about mainstream films!". Remember that? Come on, I'm not crazy, I swear. Shit, is that the smell of tomato sauce coming from the kitchen? I guess it really is Sunday... See ya at work.

1. Albert Hammond Jr - Scared.mp3
2. Black Kids - Hurricane Jane.mp3
3. Lackthereof - The Columbia.mp3
4. Mogwai - Christmas Song.mp3
5. The Dutchess and The Duke - The Prisoner.mp3
6. Women - Black Rice.mp3
7. Bloc Party - Flux.mp3
8. Pnau - Come Together.mp3
9. Sigur Rós - Inní mér syngur vitleysingur
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Due to the length of this post, please ignore this link- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


Hide the women and children! Is this what the 10 o'clock news is always warning us about?! But really, who are these dentists? What makes them so secretive? Is they at all related to the Alan Rudolph film "The Secret Lives of Dentists"? And why in God's name don't they want us to know about Teeth Whitening?! We'll bring you the truth (hopefully) at a later date!

Some tunes to calm your teeth down:
Sam Sparro - Black & Gold.mp3
Black Kids - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You.mp3
Late of the Pier - Bathroom Gurgle.mp3
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

antediluvian \an-tih-duh-LOO-vee-uhn\, adjective:
1. Antiquated; from or belonging to a much earlier time

- The antediluvian fears of apocalypse were revisited for a few hilarious years when the entire world was convinced that computers were going to destroy the Earth because they were pissed about the year changing from '99 to '00.

- Taking in the sweet sounds of Shakespeare's antediluvian verse is like being serenaded to sleep by Bob Barker.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, your antediluvian, Draconian leadership in this household must be stopped!
Never Becky! Little Jimmy must learn! If he gets to go in his pants while sitting on your lap, then he must feel the same wrath from you! Call me Solomon bitch!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Ali Starzyk and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“I wanted desperately to be an American badass"

- Comedian Jack Black explaining the reasoning behind his dark past of drug abuse.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Drew Carey explaining your daily routine.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Aaron Burr proudly justifying your stealth popping of a cap in Alexander Hamilton's "bitch Federalist ass".

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are William Hung attempting to explain to your angry Asian parents why you decided to fly halfway across the country and spend the last week auditioning for American Idol in order to "Live La Vida Loca" instead of passing your final college exam, and thus setting yourself up to "Live La Vida in a box"

PS: The team here is so overly excited about the fact that the official Advanced Theory Blog just posted two of our articles, acknowledging our level of advancement. This is HUGE news for us, considering that we are massive fans of the theory, Jason Hartley, and Chuck Klosterman.

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
Department of Eagles - In Ear Park.mp3
The Dutchess and the Duke - You Can Tell the Truth Now.mp3
The Kooks - Naive.mp3
Midnight Juggernauts - Dystopia (Cut Copy Remix).mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

In honor of today's poll winners, I've made a video response to a spoof music video by popular YouTuber The Venetian Princess. Her video was a play on Miley's new song, "7 Things" by talking about the 7 (or more) things that girls need to do but that guys don't. Here I pose as the beloved Kevin Jonas of the Jonas Brothers, letting Miley know that she's got nothing to worry about-

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This article does not go onto another page, please ignore this link- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

Ya Know What Really Grinds My Gears...
The Jonas Brothers' Worldwide Fame - 35%
Rachel Ray's Beautiful Voice - 28%
Bob Saget's Smug Countenance - 2%
Hannah Montana's Existence - 33%

It's nice to know I'm among friends. Taking the cake this time was (technically) the fame of the Jonas Brothers. Still I don't think it's fair to accept things by numbers alone. Let's look at the phrasing-- yes 35% of the voting population is frustrated by The Jonas Brothers' worldwide fame, but at a very close second place (33%) is Hannah Montana's very EXISTENCE. This implies that for the portion of the population that wants to see the Jonas Brothers fail, a nearly equal chunk wants to see Hannah Montana die. Incredible. Although, let's not be too hasty, Hannah Montana ISN'T A REAL PERSON!! Additionally, I was pleased to see Rachel Ray put up a respectable showing in third place, though I was heartbroken by the lack of passion against Bob Saget and his dirty, dirty face. Seriously, if you think this is the nice guy you know from Full House, just watch his rendition of the aristocrats.

New Poll: My Name is...
Which of these rappers would you compare yourself to:
a. Snoop Dogg
b. Eminem
c. Dr. Dre
d. Kanye West

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!

-------------------------------------
This article does not continue onto another page, ignore this link- MORE»

Stelios Phili EDITOR

puerile \PYOO-uhr-uhl; PYOOR-uhl\, adjective:
1. Displaying or suggesting a lack of maturity; juvenile; childish.

Stel- Don't let his puerile name fool you - Kid Rock really is a skeevy man in his late 30's.

Jeff- Chachi's puerile efforts with the ladies made him blind to the fact that, even after they got married, Joanie was still banging the Fonz.

- In the epic film Titanic, Rose's puerile mind led her to misunderstand Jack's pleas of, "Never let go", accidentally translating them to mean, "wait, hold on, actually, just let me go, dying sounds nice."

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick you sick, disgusting, puerile animal you!
Oh man, Becky, this gets easier every day- at least sick and disgusting are synonyms, and somewhat accurately describe my actions, but there is nothing pure about having an illegitimate child with the neighbor, naming it Derrick the second, keeping him in our basement for the last 7 years, and only letting him out so that he may be the starting first baseman for the recreational baseball team that I secretly coach on the side.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Stelios Phili EDITOR

First, Radiohead releases an album without a physical CD or record label. Now, they record a music video without cameras. That's right, their upcoming video for "House of Cards" is shot with laser beams. If that isn't badass, then I don't know what is. The technology for this procedure is called Geometric Informatics, which involves 64 laser beams, rotating 360 degrees, shooting 900 times per minute to capture the live performance. Having recorded Kid A, the best robot make-out album of 2000, and releasing In Rainbows via internet, Radiohead will officially be the most tech savvy group in the world upon the release of this video in the next few days.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“She wanted to get married and have a child with me — she wanted a Cuban child."

- Former Major League Baseball star Jose Canseco discussing Madonna's supposed intent for meeting him a few years back.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are Fidel Castro reminiscing about the days when your iron fist was matched in strength by your pimp hand.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you deceive yet another Latina woman who longs for a purebred child... You are such a bastard Cuba Gooding Jr.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you, Elián González, hold an exclusive interview with Barbara Walters to reveal that you actually chose to go back Cuba, deeming life under the dictatorship to be the safest option after meeting Madonna. "¡¡Ella no es una virgen!!"

Some late night tunes to keep you awake with us:
The Kooks - Always Where I Need To Be.mp3
Bloc Party - The Prayer.mp3
Lackthereof - Last November.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Stelios Phili EDITOR

"All he wanted to do was dance" - the tag line of the 1984 movie, Footloose, which stars Kevin Bacon. Remembering this film is kind of like recalling how Mark Wahlberg used to be a meat-head rapper in the 90's; both are moments in time that should never be recreated for the sake of human progress. Indie-artist, Doveman, however, has avoided such danger, not by remaking Footloose (Why Zac Efron? Why??), but rather, by entirely reenvisioning the Footloose soundtrack. The album began as a request from Doveman's friend, Gabriel Greenberg, who links the movie with the memory of his half-sister. Greenberg describes Footloose as "a portrait of 80's love, desire, pain, freedom, and frenzy; of being a teenager in a time of change." Doveman's take on the soundtrack is meant as a "reply to the past, [telling] our own story about being young." The results are truly beautiful. What was originally an 80's boner of all things corny is now a portrait of poignancy and nostalgia. For example, the 1984 version of "Never" doubles as a Richard Simmons aerobics jam, yet Doveman's sparse piano remake of the track echoes the wistfulness of Elliott Smith or Damien Rice. Dance with Doveman - the album is available for free on his website.

Doveman - Never.mp3
Doveman - Footloose.mp3
Doveman - Holding Out for a Hero.mp3

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


So I've officially begun a series of responding to popular YouTube videos with what at first vaguely appears to be legitimate answers to their questions, but then falls into PopSense's ridiculous clutches. This one is in response to sxephil and his question; What is your worst travel story? Many more to come.

Some early evening tunes:
Midnight Juggernauts - Shadows.mp3
Pnau - Embrace (Fred Falke & Miami Horror Remix).mp3
The Dutchess and the Duke - Strangers.mp3
Sunny Day Sets Fire - Stranger.mp3

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

The Shins are a band that is comprised of those creeper flannel wearing guys who sat in the back of your advanced english class, giggling to each other over sentence structure and basic rhetoric. Cheery without being saccharine-sweet, they've become the voice of the poor man's intellectual. Their lyrics can come off as a bit wordy and puzzling at times, but hey, maybe we should just chock that up to their being from Oregon. With three albums out, the last Wincing the Night Away that made it's debut in 2007, this indie band has tried on many faces in attempts at finding their identity in the music world. While the last two records remained true to their pop-esque roots, their debut album Oh, Inverted World introduced us to a creepier sounding Shins, with songs like "Your Algebra" that may resonate on the soundtrack to your nightmares. Gaining widespread notoriety from that instant indie classic (note I say this with sarcasm) Garden State, it seems as though everyone and their mother fell in love with this quirky band from down under. So while I scoff at Zach Braff's attempt at producing cinematic "art", I must applaud his decision to introduce this geeky group of gentlemen to mainstream audiences everywhere. Colorful and eccentric, just listening once will have you turning beautifully constructed metaphor while riding away into the Oregon-ian sunset on your high horse.

The Shins - Your Algebra.mp3
The Shins - Young Pilgrims.mp3
The Shins - Mine's Not A High Horse.mp3

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Self-photo and modeling by Stel

propound \pruh-POWND\, transitive verb:
1. To offer for consideration; to put forward; to propose.

Jeff- In the classic film Billy Madison, Billy and his friends propound the philosophical question of antiquity to Old Man Clemmons; which is stronger-- the hiking boot or the flaming bag of shit.

Stel- Always one to propound a bloodthirsty, opium-fueled knife fight, Regis Philbin is often well-received by drug lords and hunters alike. Few, however, realize that he is not joking.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
No, Derrick, it in fact is not ok to propound that at the church meeting...
Oh, relax Becky, it's not like any black people there anyway.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“We don't wanna hear that shit no more. It's a new day. It's a new voice. I'm here now. We don't need Jesse; I'm here. I got this."

- Rapper Nas responding to Jesse Jackson's claims that, "See, Barack's been, um, talking down to black people on this faith-based ... I want to cut his nuts off."

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are JT remembering the time that Jesse McCartney took sexy away by pouring hot syrup in his mangina and touring the nation licking sidewalks, only to discover that he wasn't talented enough to ever bring sexy back.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Bob Saget at an abcfamily press conference and you are informing your african american fan base that you, snoop, and your hot twin daughters will be launching a badass new album entitled, "Full House Doggystyle" and Uncle Jesse will not appear nude on the cover.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you, Meowth, are sick of Jesse's weasley, fire-crotch bullshit, and have decided to give up on that dream gang bang with the entire Rocket Team and instead just go for Nurse Joy by yourself.

Mini Midnight Magic Music Mix (!):
RATATAT - Mumtaz Kahn.mp3
RATATAT - Wildcat.mp3
Sunday Sets Fire - Stranger.mp3
Pnau - Baby (Breakbot Remix).mp3
Albert Hammond Jr. - GfC.mp3
Albert Hammond Jr. - You Won't Be Fooled By This.mp3
Albert Hammond Jr. - G Up.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Stelios Phili EDITOR



When you are Pharrell Williams, your farts sound like platinum records. This is why "My Drive Thru" can sound sexy, even though its innuendo's are derived from McDonald's - "I have one question, can i help you? Now thank you, for coming through my drive thru." Paper always been hip. Stop motion animation excites me to the point of smashing my mom's dishes, but combining Santogold (the new queen of indie-pop) and Julian Casablancas (The balls-out-badass of alt-rock) with Pharrell and paper and stop motion?? Now that's just ballin'.

N.E.R.D. - My Drive Thru.mp3
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito


In celebration of his landslide victory in our last poll...

Johnny you big studly star
How did you become such a cutie
You know that I'd go very far
In search of Jack Sparrow's booty

You've stolen the silver screen
From Platoon to Donnie Brasco
You've become the latest James Dean
Cause you're hotter than any tabasco

Your lines are perfectly placed
You're more than satisfactory
So please let me take a quick taste
From your delicious white-chocolate factory

You're good with that fella Tim Burton
You meet all the acting demands
Just know that I've been'a hurtin
To be touched by your big scissor hands

Johnny you've stolen my soul
Only you can make me cry
By God, I would pay any toll
To enjoy your famous meat pie

I don't even know what to do
I'm obsessed if you couldn't tell
I can see each and every tattoo
For my Secret Window serves me well MORE»

Editor's note: Spoilers Abound! If you'd like to catch up with "Lost", all episodes are available for free, in streaming HD on abc.com

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

Any current fan of the show knows that there has been a lot of meddling with the idea of time travel and such, but just recently it has occurred to me that the writers of the show have used time travel ever since the series premiered. Every week, the audience is taken back in time as we learn the history of an island survivor or get filled in on yet another integral part of the show’s incredibly dense story. This sort of travel allows us as the viewers to connect more with each of the characters and understand why they might act the way they do. After all, knowing Locke’s history on wheels allows me to maybe agree with him that miracles do take place on the island.

Yet, we’re not the only ones who get to experience this sort of time travel.The character Desmond undergoes two ordeals in the series that allow him to be subconsciously sent back in time: one instance allows him to stay in the past for an extended period of time with all the knowledge he had amassed from all events leading up to the present. Yet this little visit to the past comes with an extra kick. When Desmond’s consciousness returns to his present life on the island, he says that he saw his life flash before his eyes, but it didn’t stop flashing. He began to see events of his life that had not yet taken place: he could see the future.

And I didn’t realize this until I started writing this, but the writers used this storyline to foreshadow what was in store for us as viewers. Not merely seeing a television character act on visions of the future, but that we would soon come to experience the phenomena that Desmond had. After spending the past three years of watching these castaways’ lives flash before our eyes, we would begin to see glimpses of their futures…

Which is what we all began to saw at the end of Season 3 of the series: a glimpse of some the characters’ lives who had made it off the island in the near future. Yet another plot turn in the complex story that Lost had become, but one that was looked upon with much excitement and anticipation, something the show desperately needed at that point.

You see, for those not familiar with LOST, let’s just say time was not really on its side in the production of it. Sure, their first season was ground-breaking; they had taken a fairly clichéd scenario of people stranded on an island and thrown in quite a few tricks to spice things up, including the flashback device that I’ve been blabbering about and quite a few intriguing mysteries to the story. But once Season 2 rolled around, fans (including myself) wanted some answers, yet what we got was answers that led to more questions, and new storylines that led to well… more questions.

Yet quite honestly, I can’t blame the writers for this. Not knowing how long the series would be producing new episodes, revealing the all the story’s mysteries early on would be a big mistake for the show’s future. Unfortunately, this created a stalling effect, in which fans were forced to endure lackluster episodes, including ones that featured a hallucinating ex-junky kidnapping a baby in order to baptize him.

But towards the end of Season 3 came a ray of hope: LOST would air only three more seasons with the plan to end in 2010. There was an end date and a plan. Upon establishing how much time the show had left, the writers were able to map out the rest of the story and make it compelling and exciting along the way.

So once Season 4 showed up this year, the fans that had decided to endure the previous seasons’ cold moments were rewarded for their viewing loyalty. Ask any critic or fan, LOST has been revitalized! With a combination of flash-forwards and flashbacks for both new and old characters, a new time-traveling experience for Desmond, and the exciting premise that some of the castaways do indeed make it off the island, the series has taken off again and has begun to regain the glory it once had. Even with the writer’s strike taking place, the show still pressed on to one of its better seasons. Time was finally on its side.

But what about the fans who gave up on the show years before? How does the show get them back or make new fans? Sure, they could start watching with their friends who had told them how great the show had become, but given how far the story has advanced, newcomers and born-again fans would be… well, lost. Thankfully, time is once again on the LOST’s side with the help of our world’s increasing technology: abc.com has all LOST episodes produced thus far available for high-definition video streaming, allowing newbies to watch from the very beginning and catch up to the present and former fans do pick up where they left off to fill in the holes from when they didn’t watch.

So now that I’ve taken you back through a simple history of LOST’s antics with time, it seems only fitting given the content of this article to close with a flash to the future. In the show, we can expect to see two timelines present throughout Season 5: one involving those off the island in 2008 and the other involving those on the island in 2005. In addition to that, we will probably see an arsenal of flashbacks and flash-forwards (especially for John Locke) and maybe even a combination of both in one episode. The ability for the actual characters to time-travel will more than likely increase to more than jus Desmond’s few encounters; those who have been following Season 4 know that one character has already jumped a few months into the future.

As for the show itself, I expect the number of viewers will also take a positive turn with the two years it has left. With online streaming at abc.com and a story filled with riveting conflicts and compelling characters, LOST will have more people watching it than it has ever before seen. The future is bright…


MORE»

- Jeff Luppino-Esposito

For Men: Which of these celebrities would you rather be?
Hugh Grant - 5%
Johnny Depp - 42%
Will Smith - 27%
Brad Pitt - 24%

For the Women: Which of these celebrities would you rather marry?
Hugh Grant - 5%
Johnny Depp - 43%
Will Smith - 29%
Brad Pitt - 21%

With a pirate's swagger, the one, the only Johnny Depp swept both sides of the deck in the latest PopSense polls. Our first dual-poll was a great success, showing, by far, our highest voter turnout, and our greatest number of Flesh-Grinded Meat Pies to Votes ratio ever. I was informed by our token female contributor, Ali, that any woman who claims not to be attracted to Johnny Depp is lying. I'd like to officially extend that statement to saying that any form of life who claims not to be attracted to Johnny Depp is lying. His air of mystery, his versatility as an actor, his wild rock star side, and his badass goatee guarantee him a spot in hottie heaven. Even my mother, who thought that Richard Gere should've been included in this poll, admitted a level of attraction to Depp, but gave her reasoning to be, "Well, he likes to look like a scoundrel, but he's really not!" In a noteworthy second on both sides was the always-lovable Fresh Prince of Belair; Will Smith. Smith and Brad Pitt likely received the female vote for their general air of responsibility (as documented by Brad Pitt's unbelievable patience for Angelina Jolie's obsession with adopting entire small third world countries and by WIll Smith's unbelievable patience for Carlton's antics). In a laughably pathetic last place on both sides was that little cheating scalliwag Hugh Grant; the thought process probably went something like this-- Oh that British accent, I'm in "Love, Actually" you're just a dirty old man, get out of here. Maybe we're not so different after all...

New Poll: As Peter Griffin Would Say
Ya know what really grinds my gears...
a. The Jonas Brothers' worldwide fame
b. Rachel Ray's beautiful voice
c. Bob Saget's smug countenance
d. Hannah Montana's existence

Go VOTE NOW in the right side bar!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Photo by Stel

contemn \kuhn-TEM\, transitive verb:
1. To regard or treat with disdain or contempt; to scorn; to despise.

Jeff- Despite its overtly sexual undertones and instances of underwater alcoholism, I would never contemn the act of watching Old Greg.

- I have cultivated a beautiful ability to contemn every Disney musical artist.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Derrick, I think it's fair to say there are very few things you do that I actually do not violently contemn.
Oh, Becky, that's a little extreme; let's not be so hasty and conveniently 'forget' that entire week where I was feeling extra generous, and let you and Little Jimmy eat before I even got home from the strip club!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

-Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito

“He kept smiling, acting as if he was a little kid."

- Friend of Yankees all-star Alex Rodriguez (aka A-Rod) commenting on Rodriguez's boyish demeanor upon his being in the company of Madonna a few months ago.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are the chesire cat, referring to yourself in the third person, because you are one sly son of a bitch.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are explaining to your wife why your adopted Indian son will be receiving a serious beating tonight after his disappointing showing at the Spelling Bee.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Luke Skywalker talking to that rotting little shit, Yoda, trying to get the goods on how to save the universe and simultaneously bone Leia, but he keeps talking backwards and giving you that stupid smug look.

Some late night tunes:
The Presets - A New Sky.mp3
The Presets - Yippiyo-ay.mp3
Beck - Volcano.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Editor’s Note: A great man sent me this report, which came as a result of his ridiculously... entertaining Birthday Celebration earlier in the year. All names have been changed for obvious reasons, but our subject is referred to as “DJ” in this report. If this story shocks you, imagine waking up the morning after your birthday and being handed this by your RA without remembering any of it...

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: DOUG MCFARLAND
Date: Tue, Mar 11, 2008 at 10:52 AM
Subject: Communication report for two intoxicated students, March 11
To: BSchlonger@anonymous.edu

I was contacted by security at 2:00am because a resident (Hugo O’Tool,
209A) reported that two of his suitemates (Nickname: Stork, Daniel "DJ”) were visibly intoxicated and that DJ had urinated in the hallway. Hugo had initially contacted security because Stork and DJ were locked out of their room. While waiting for security to arrive to unlock the door, Hugo observed DJ urinating outside their suite door. Hugo also heard Stork vomiting in the suite bathroom.

When I arrived at the scene, Stork was in his boxers sitting in the
2 East lounge being evaluated by staff for intoxication. Campus security officer Chico Rodriguez was at the scene knocking on the door of suite 209 to talk to DJ. Campus security then entered the room because DJ was not responding.

>From room 209B, officer Rodriguez confiscated:

1. Empty bottle of Jack Daniels
2. Empty bottle of Jameson
3. 2 empty bottles of Svedka Vodka
4. Empty bottle of Captain Morgan
5. Empty can of Keystone Light
6. Empty can of Miller Light

Meanwhile, the staff determined that Stork did not need to be
hospitalized (I signed the paperwork as a witness). It was deemed necessary, however, for DJ to be sent to the hospital that night. After retrieving his medical card from the AcCoy ResLife office, I was driven by security to ER admitting room of Transit Union hospital.

At the hospital, DJ was belligerent and had to be restrained by a
campus security officer. Hospital security was called for backup. DJ
was extremely offensive to the security guards, cursing loudly at them and demeaning their physical appearance. He said to the officers "I'm not drunk-- Test me motherfuckers" and "I'm better lookin' than y'all
combined." After calming down slightly, DJ was taken to be evaluated.
While DJ was being evaluated, I gave the hospital his insurance card.

After approximately fifteen minutes, a hospital worker told me that
DJ had fled the hospital. I left the hospital to see whether
Security had apprehended DJ. I found DJ being talked to by three
security officers on Greenway St. The officers then drove DJ back to
Transit Union Hospital.

Back at the hospital, DJ was again taken to be examined by hospital
staff. After approximately twenty minutes, a hospital worker informed
me that DJ had been released because there was no medical reason for
him to be admitted to the hospital. A campus security officer then drove me back to Holman and advised me to contact security in case any new developments arose.

MORE»

Stelios Phili EDITOR



I know what you're all thinking. "I had no idea the afro guy from The Strokes can sing!" Well, he is no Julian Casablancas, but his raw/fragile voice fits nicely with his alt-indie tunes and gets the job done. I imagine that Casablancas accounts for the badass side of The Strokes, while Hammond keeps the band well-rounded with his sensitive side - as a child, he probably never cried much, but definitely shed a tear when someone threw dirt at him."GfC" is the single from his sophomore album, ¿Cómo Te Llama?. It is a tad more Strokes-like than his previous effort, but still retains the good ole' Hammond charm. Give this Stroke a listen. Word.

Albert Hammond Jr. - GfC.mp3
Albert Hammond Jr. - You Won't Be Fooled By This.mp3
Albert Hammond Jr. - G Up.mp3
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Editor's note: Part 2 of this post (Lost: Time's Symbiotic Parasite) will be available tomorrow at 4pm EST and will include spoilers. If you'd like to catch up with "Lost", all episodes are available for free, in streaming HD on abc.com

Special Guest Post by A.A.C. Puryear
(Enjoy this post? Read other articles contributed by A.A.C.)

I remember it as if it was yesterday. In the fall of my tenth grade year, I came home one Wednesday night after a grueling cross-country meet still tired, sore, and covered in a fine layer of salt from the sweat that had dried on my skin. Yes, I know it doesn’t sound pretty. Anyway, I walked into the living room to find my dad sitting on the couch watching TV, specifically a bald man sitting at his office cubicle taking crap from his jerk of a boss.
“What show is this?” I asked my dad.

“Lost,” he replied...

“Wait, I thought that was about a bunch of people who crash on a deserted island,” I said, recalling the multitude of commercials I had seen the past summer in which Dominic Monaghan ominously queried, “Where are we?”

After the show soon cut to a commercial break, my dad explained to me that yes, LOST was indeed a show about people on a deserted island, but every episode also included a small background story on a survivor, showing his or her life before the fated plane crash.
Intrigued, I delayed my much-needed shower to sit down and finish watching the >episode. The show returned displaying the same bald man, who I came to know as John Locke, from the previous scene standing on the beach of the island telling the other survivors they needed to hunt for food. For the next thirty minutes, I sat watching this John Locke character lead the hunting charge on the island, even encountering what some survivors called “the monster”, while also taking a look at his off-island life where he sat around in the office of a box company. After a while I began thinking to myself, this is a pretty interesting show.

Finally, it happened. The show cuts to Locke in Australia planning to go on a trip called a walkabout. He’s sitting at a desk with another man who tells him he can go on the walkabout because he didn’t tell them about his “condition”. Locke start yelling at the man saying how he has had the condition for four years and then the camera reveals to me that Locke is in a wheelchair! Then it cuts to a scene that must have occurred after the initial plane crash on the island: John Locke is lying on the beach staring at his wheelchair, which is just out of his reach. And then by some unexplained phenomenon, Locke gets up on his feet and begins walking around.

The story of a man who was cured from paralysis by crashing on an island was enough to make me diligently watch LOST week after week. Each episode I would learn more about a new character by seeing who they were on the island and who they had been off of it. I met a spinal surgeon with daddy issues, an attractive fugitive on the run, a former Republican Guard soldier with an unrequited love, a hefty millionaire with a guilt complex, a southern con artist bent on revenge, an out-of-work carpenter who just wants to see his son, and many more characters with compelling stories who were all brought together by a single plane ride.

Now I could go on forever talking about LOST (some may think I already have), but tomorrow I am going to do my best to restrain myself and focus on one mere aspect of the show: the element of time and how its manipulation manifests itself on and off the program.

A moderately fitting tune:
David Bowie - Ground Control.mp3
MORE»

emolument \ih-MOL-yuh-muhnt\, noun:
1. The wages or perquisites arising from office, employment, or labor; gain; compensation.

Jeff- The true emolument of the daily blogger is to receive at least 4 daily death threats and 3 remarks about yo' momma's weight... and love it.

Stel- Poridge, vittles, and cabbage, the emolument of a pauper, or the breakfast, lunch, and dinner of Kate Moss.

The Chronicles of Derrick and Becky
Damnit Derrick, how could you consider that emolument?!
Well, Becky, some of my clients think that they're paying for more than just the sex, so I think you should show Candy a little more respect at the dinner table.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

“We had a contract for cage fighting. We were deceived."

- Dwight Duncan, president and CEO of 'Four States Fair Grounds', talking to the press after the fans in the Arkansas arena got just a little bit upset in response to the two 'wrestlers' (one of which was Sacha Baron Cohen covertly doing a scene for his upcoming "Bruno" film) who began ripping off each other's clothes and passionately enjoying one another's company.

A pretty good time to use this quote:
When you are a pissed off lion with a law degree, fighting for your pack's rights in the court room after your team was totally about to ravage the gladiators until someone opened the gates, let those little punks run out, and then they poked you with sticks until you calmed down... and then they all started singing "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" to mock you, and because they know that one always makes you cry.

A terrible time to use this quote:
When you are Mel Gibson talking in the first-person-plural, misunderstanding the plot line of your new movie about innocent Jews.

The winning time to use this quote:
When you are Michael Vick's equally idiotic and scummy family members fighting for your pack's rights, making the claim that Michael can't use jail and public humiliation as an excuse to not pay his debts to each of them, which equal out to approximately 5 million dollars worth of dog biscuit coupons.

Thanks to all of you who joined the Facebook Fan Page, we put out some of our best numbers ever today and had a lot of fun along the way. Keep up the support, we love you dearly!

Some late night tunes:
The Dutchess and the Duke - Reservoir Park.mp3
Midnight Juggernauts - Into the Galaxy.mp3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Which of these is so not 'hip'?
Wearing Shoes - 3%
Not appreciating Juno - 27%
Loving Coldplay - 41%
Not being Vegan enough - 27%

In a fantastic voter turnout, the PopSense readers have supported Rolling Stones' claim that Chris Martin is the "Jesus of uncool". Now, don't get us wrong, we show the love to Coldplay, we even recorded a cover off of their new album. But, this seems to be the perfect response to our vaguely confusing poll question. There is a lack of clarity between whether we're being sarcastic or not. And when I say lack of clarity, I mean lack of clear intent. Either way, as I was saying, the choice of Coldplay, then, is particularly fitting. In the world of indie music, you're just not allowed to openly love them. Yes, it's every hipster's guilty pleasure to rock the Chris Martin open-palm-pump in between pretending to like crappy 80's music, but it's still a faux pas to admit it. In the mainstream world, Coldplay is appreciated but approached with an air of caution. Liking Coldplay, was, I remind you, a key factor in determining whether or not one character was 'gay' in the 40 year old virgin. Also, on both sides of the cultural spectrum- he can't keep wearing that jacket. So, I'm definitely pleased to see that PopSense's readers overcame our directionless question and went with a very intelligent choice. I'm also proud to see "Not appreciating Juno" tied for second... fun fact about PopSense- it all started when I came home from seeing Juno and had an unbelievable desire to bitch about it. Oh Ellen Page you have quite a power over me.

New Poll: Mars and Venus are too close to serve as an accurate analogy
For the Men: Which of these celebrities would you rather be?
For the Women: Which of these celebrities would you rather marry?
a. Hugh Grant
b. Johnny Depp
c. Will Smith
d. Brad Pitt

Go VOTE NOW in our first ever dual-poll up on the top of the right side bar!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To view this article in a separate window, click here- MORE»

Stelios Phili and Jeff Luppino-Esposito EDITORS

The members of The Strokes and The Beatles (living and dead) have mated! Through incredible medical breakthroughs (funded by none other than Ringo Starr), the two bands’ seeds have mixed, thereby birthing one badass baby – The Postelles. While indie-flair might be expected out of a modern band, only a special few can truly embody the classic rock aura in these seemingly so different times. “Of course, that’s the best, I love that,” says lead singer Daniel Balk, who has embraced the claims of critics and fans alike that The Postelles have captured a sound that would be considered long gone by most.

Having just returned from a crazy trip across the pond (“When you get free drinks you just drink forever, I mean, you know, why not?”), Daniel Balk spoke with the PopSense team about the Postelle’s eurotrip, the direction of the music industry, and future of The Postelles.

Recently augmenting The Postelles tone is none other than guitarist Albert Hammond Jr. of The Strokes. What was once thought to be a childhood dream became a reality when the Postelles found themselves “sitting in [Hammond's] room playing his guitars.” Balk describes Hammond’s aid as being invaluable to The Postelles progression, let alone the whole experience being, “pretty fuckin’ cool.” The newest single from The Postelles, “123 Stop” was a product of Hammond's guitar savvy that helped make their sound, “really beefy, and really good.”

With The Postelles constantly singing of the ceaseless learning experience that is ‘woman’, the PopSense team needed to know if this master of the stage and the heart had any advice to impart upon struggling males everywhere: “Just be confident, don’t act cocky...but almost act cocky.” We all laughed, yet we knew he was right.

“123 Stop,” along with the other band's tunes, “are all pretty much stories,” whether they are a single instance of failed love or a delicious mixture of life’s unmarked ingredients. That’s why it came as no surprise when Balk mentioned his interest in turning one night in the UK into what we can only assume would be an incredible anthem to drunken revelry (as the British lend themselves well too).

“This kid who was with us decided to start peeing all over the outside of the bar. The line of people, security guards, everyone there, he's completely drunk, wasted, just whips out his...‘whatever’, starts pissing everywhere, the cops come look at him and say, ‘ya know you can’t do that, we’re gonna arrest you’. But the cops are pretty cool and they leave. Then the kid turns around and starts peeing all over his friends. Luckily we moved away. We were crying laughing. I don’t know why he did it, but it was insane.”

The point of this story is that The Postelles braved a foreign country and did not get peed on. They are a band that knows how to adapt.

Though these tales of piss and beer may sound silly at first, they are (indirectly) reflective of an entirely different music atmosphere that Balk refers to as a “more wild scene.” “I’m not saying that people [in the U.S.] are bad or anything, but I think its literally just the drinking age. All the clubs here are 21 and over, so it’s really tough for kids to come out and see the bands, it sucks. You gotta change that, otherwise live music in New York is just gonna go down the drain.”

Another big difference that the band observed was the general attitude of the European fan (alcohol-induced or not). “People love music over there – when you play [in the U.S.] you feel like you have to impress the fans, whereas in Europe, they’re excited to see the band and just listen to the music.”

Despite their appreciation for the British scene, The Postelles have not forgotten their roots. “We felt welcome, but we definitely felt like the ‘band from New York City.’ I think people have a funny feeling about New York City . . . They’re almost scared of you at first, ask all these questions about whether we do all these horrible things... I guess we do, I don’t know.”

On the topic of British rapscallions, we wanted to probe Balk’s thoughts on Radiohead’s “pay-if-you-wish” album release of In Rainbows and how it affects the direction of the American music industry. “I think it was a cool idea of Radiohead to do that, though Thom Yorke wasn’t doing it to say this is where the music business is. He was just saying that’s where Radiohead felt they were at.”

“I don’t know if the music industry should be going or if it has to go in that direction, I hope it doesn’t honestly, because it’s really difficult-- the record business has a hold on every band. 'Cause if the bands can’t make any money, then the record labels don’t make any money, then everyone’s screwed, and everyone’s losing their job.”

But don’t get Balk wrong, he knows what needs to be done and remembers what is most important; “I love downloading, I mean we put up all our tracks on our Myspace for download because we want everyone to hear it and that’s the most important thing to us.”

Like his band’s music, Balk’s ideal vision for the future of the music scene jives with the days of yore. “It’d be more like in the 60s, in the Motown era, where bands just released singles and then at the end of the year put out an album or two, instead of using such a big budget to record. I don’t think the album’s dead, but I think singles should be introduced more.”

He recounts a better day when, “The Beatles would release two or three albums a year, cause they could record in two days. Now bands get so pretentious and stay in the studio for 3 months, spend $200,000 on a record.”

Although they’