Bring on the blatantly superfluous shirtless scenes.

The Post has reported that Keith Huff's "A Steady Rain" will appear on Broadway with heartthrobs Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig as the leading men.

The pair will be playing the roles of 'two Chicago cops whose lifelong friendship is put to the test when they become involved in a domestic dispute in a poor neighborhood" (read: Daniel Craig and Hugh Jackman will appear in skimpy police uniforms).

Hugh is a regular of the NYC stage, drawing in big bucks for his maraca-shaking role in 'The Boy From Oz' in 2004, but all has been quiet on his theater front until now-- until now when he reveals his plans to openly put Daniel Craig and the Bond series to shame all in the name of Australian glory. Penal colony this, you Outback-hatin' bastards.

Despite the heavy dramatic tones of "A Steady Rain," the pair is projected to outsell Julia Roberts from her role in "Three Days of Rain" which garnered $10 million in ticket sales in just 12 weeks. All evidence seems to suggest that slow and steady rain clearly wins the race. And that Julia Roberts' smile just pisses everybody off (Yes, it pisses everybody off so much that they chose to pay obnoxious ticket prices just to go to the theater and tell her in person).

The play is being produced by Barbara Broccoli, who, despite being absurdly named, has seen past failure on Broadway with her production of 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang' in '05. And, by 'despite' I don't mean 'despite'.

After that $10 million flop, she seems to have a safer bet with Jackman and Craig, but we all remember the episode of the Rugrats where Phil and Lil's parents got extremely offended when the Pickles mocked their favorite film of all time-- Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. If Betty and Howard couldn't save Broadway, then I'd wager no one can.

-Jeff Luppino-Esposito