PopSense and co. just had a very successful night claiming Facebook Usernames as best as we could. With hundreds of thousands being claimed in the first few minutes, it's a rough world of honest, innocent people out there trying to get what is rightfully theirs, and we're just doing our small part to impede that practical course of action.

Let's just say that, at the very least, we can finally give Pitchfork the 6.3 rating up its ass that it has long deserved.

Here's how it all went down--

11:50pm - Oh shit! We were too busy eating Mushroom Burgers all night to remember that we can get our Facebook Username tonight, let's now act upon this piece of information accordingly and keep track of times that we do/say things so we can recount it later!

11:51pm - WAIT A SECOND! Let's create like 40 fake users so we can claim like... 40 usernames! I call Facebook.com/BarackObama !!!

11:57pm - Oh shit... users created after a certain date that I no longer remember aren't allowed to make usernames. Well don't we feel like douchebags.

11:59pm - We are not going down without a fight! Call everyone you know and tell them to start claiming every corporation they can!

12:00am - YES we got facebook.com/Pitchfork!! And it directs to the fake facebook of a library at the University of Virginia that I created a year ago! OH HELL YES WE ALSO GOT FACEBOOK.COM/PITCHFORK MEDIA AND IT GOES TO OUR STAFF WRITER ARIAN MURATI'S PAGE!... Oh and we got Facebook.com/PopSense

12:01am - Ok we have ONE MORE fake user we can abuse for the sake of PopSense glory, what can we name it?? Oh I know!

12:02am - (after pausing for 50 seconds for dramatic effect) Shit, facebook.com/TheJackson5 is taken. Goddammit. Ok, hmm. hmmm.

12:06am - HMMMMMMM.

12:10am - Wait! Facebook.com/Twitter! Nope. SHIT. Facebook.com/perezhilton! No. BALLS. Facebook.com/JesusChrist. Hell no. I hate my life.

12:15am - How 'bout we try typing in every celebrity we can think of? Nothing? Fine. OH how about 90's bands! Really?? Someone took Facebook.com/OTown??? This blows.

12:20am - Wow, I'm an idiot, you should obviously do...

12:21am - Thank God, we are officially the owners of www.Facebook.com/MillardFillmore. Best president ever. Or maybe we should have taken Aaron Burr who was too cool to even be the President. Whatever, Millard Fillmore was the f*ckin man.

12:22am - Oh yeah, and we still pwned the shit out of Pitchfork.

Enjoy a mix for the weekend and tell us about your Facebook Username successes or woes in the comments!

Joanna Newsom - Cosmia.mp3
Yo La Tengo - Periodically Double Or Triple.mp3
The Radio Dept. - David.mp3
The Phenomenal Handclap Band - 15 to 20.mp3
Cave Singers - Beach House.mp3
Discovery - Orange Shirt.mp3
Boys Noize – Jeffer.mp3
Lightning Dust - I Knew.mp3

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